Afire Love
by BonesPixi
Summary: What happens when Fitz wakes up from being shot with no memory of one of the most important people in his life, Olivia. Will Fitz ever remember her, or will she be gone forever? Olitz! Set in early S2 Please R&R
1. Chapter 1

**So I had a little competition on my last story to pick what my next story was and a majority of the winners picked this option.**

 **It's set in Season 2 just after Fitz has been shot.**

 **This will be a multi-chap fic btw**

 **Hope you enjoy :)**

Olivia sat next to Fitz's hospital bed. A tear crept down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away. She kept telling herself that he would be fine, that he'd wake up soon and everything would go back to normal, but it was harder to believe that with every hour he didn't wake. She had pulled the chair right up close to the bed and had not let go off his hand since she was let into his room. It had been hard to finally get some time alone with him. She had to convince both Mellie and Cyrus, and then the Secret Service agents that guarded the door.

It was well after midnight that they allowed Olivia to be able to see Fitz. And after the long, tiresome and emotionally crippling day she had had, she was exhausted. Her eyes were bloodshot and cheeks puffy, and if she rested her head she would fall asleep. She could imagine sharing the bed with him, curled up into a ball with Fitz's arm draped around her while he repeatedly told her that he was alright. That would be the dream.

They had barely spoken in the last few weeks, and when Olivia thought back over the last thing they had said to each other it made her chest hurt. That fight couldn't be the last real memory, so he had to wake up so they could fix that. She didn't want that to be the last thing he would remember of her. She needed him to know that whatever they were fighting about was no longer important and she'd give anything to forget about it and leave it in the past. When he woke up they would move on from that and really try to make their relationship work. It was ridiculous that it took a bullet in Fitz's brain for her to see that.

Olivia heard a knock on the door but didn't take her eyes off of the sleeping Fitz. "Olivia," Mellie said as she stood in the doorway. Liv looked over upon hearing the familiar voice. "You should go home," Mellie said warmly, she knew how Olivia felt about Fitz and this wasn't the time for her snipes.

"I don't want to," Olivia replied. She wanted to be by Fitz's side when he woke, and if that meant staying there all night and not sleeping for two days, then so be it.

"You're working yourself to the bone during the day, you need to sleep. We'll call you when he wakes up," Mellie pushed again. Liv was stubborn but when faced with the rational thing to do, she usually did it. "If it were up to me, I'd let you sleep here…but," Mellie added. The doctors and the Secret Service had strict rules, even she wasn't allowed to sleep in the President's hospital room.

Olivia nodded along, thinking about what she wanted and what was best. "I'll go in an hour," she replied. It was the best she could offer. Mellie took a few steps backwards and left Olivia alone. Liv watched as the door closed and turned her attention back to Fitz. She rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb, hoping that he would feel it and know she was there. "Please, please wake up," Liv said for what felt like the thousandth time since she had been there. "I need you to wake up," the words catching in her throat as she said them. "I love you. Please come back to me," she continued and the tears began to fall from her eyes again.

Liv still could comprehend that he was lying there unconscious. But it was a hell of a lot better than the alternative. Others hadn't been so lucky. She would forever be thankful that he was lying in front of her and not in some morgue. Their happily ever after was still possible here, and that was something to hold on to.

Looking down at her wrist, and seeing the time she realised it had passed the one hour she said she would be. Reluctantly she stood up, not letting go of his hand and leaned over to place her lips on Fitz's quickly. "Please wake up," Liv requested as if he were Sleeping Beauty. After no response she stood up straight, let go of his hand, picked up her coat and bag, and left the hospital room.

…

Olivia woke up before her alarm to what she could only call a short nap. She could barely sleep when she got into bed. Every time she closed her eyes all she could see was Fitz lying in his hospital bed. The first thing she did was check her phone, maybe if she was lucky she would have missed a call while she was asleep, but when she went to unlock her phone there was no new notifications. She breathed out heavily in disappointment, and then tried to convince herself that no news was in fact good news, but that was easier said than done.

After a quick shower she got ready to leave her apartment. At all times her phone was no more than an arm's reach away, and more often than not it was in her hand just waiting to ring. While at the office, it was as if she had already drunk ten cups of coffee, she was flying around giving orders and doing her own work. She knew if she stayed still for too long she would fall into despair and over think things and be too worried about Fitz to function.

Once Liv had done all she could at OPA she headed to the White House to see where she could lend her expertise. Knowing they were still down a Communications Director, and as she was the only living person to have served the current administration in that role, she thought it best to lend a hand.

Then finally as she was making herself another cup of coffee her cell began to ring. Olivia knew by the name jumping up and down on the screen that it was the call she had been waiting all day for. "Mellie?" Liv answered, hopeful to hear the words she'd been wishing so desperately for.

"He's awake," Mellie confirmed, and the largest smile filled Olivia's face. Liv let out the breath she had been holding all day, and place her hand on her chest. She could feel her heart beating at rapid speeds, and she held in the tears that were forming.

"I'll be right there," Liv said as she ended the call.

…

Olivia stood outside Fitz's hospital room for a quick minute. She took a deep breath trying to compose herself. She couldn't believe it he was awake and talking right on the other side of the door. Just thinking about it brought a huge smile to her face, one only yesterday she didn't know would ever return.

With one last deep breath she pushed the door open and walked into the room. Both Mellie and Cyrus were in there and looked to the door as Olivia entered. Liv went straight over to the bed and held on to Fitz's hand. "You're awake," she said as her eyes glistened with the tears of joy that were about to fall.

Fitz looked over to Olivia, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Who are you?"

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	2. Chapter 2

**I'm glad you seem to be liking it so far and I hope you continue to enjoy with upcoming chapters :)**

 **Thanks to all those who have followed and favourited, and also those who reviewed, it really gives you confidence when starting a new story :)**

Olivia was speechless. Her mouth hung open, she let go of Fitz's hand, and looked over to Cyrus and Mellie and they shared the looked of confusion. She blinked back the tears that would soon undoubtedly fall, only a moment ago the sign of happiness had been crushed. She hoped this was a cruel and hurtful prank because the alternative was too hard to comprehend.

"You don't know who she is?" Mellie asked as she jumped out of her chair and came to stand by the bed.

"Should I?" Fitz answered as he looked between his wife and Olivia.

Olivia's chest hurt, there was a stinging in the back of her throat and she found it difficult to breathe. But she had to compose herself. She turned her back to the room, took three deep breaths and then jump right back into the situation in a typical Olivia Pope fashion.

"How bad is his memory loss?" Liv asked, knowing that there was no way he could continue with the Presidency if it was by any means severe.

"Until twenty seconds ago, we weren't aware he had any," Cyrus replied. They had been talking and alerting Fitz to the situation, since he had woken up, aside from when the doctors were running a few tests.

"You're sure you don't know her?" Mellie asked again.

"I've never seen her before," Fitz answered, which felt like another punch in the stomach to Olivia. "Can someone please fill me in on who this woman is?" He requested extremely confused by the whole situation that was playing out before him.

"She's-" Mellie began.

"Just an old work acquaintance," Olivia interjected, though it pained her to say. "Can I speak to the two of you outside?" She asked directing her request to Mellie and Cyrus. Nodding they both followed Olivia outside Fitz's hospital room.

"I feel I should be happier about this, but it's strangely unsatisfying," Mellie said when they were out in the corridor.

"So, it's just me?" Olivia asked, side stepping what Mellie had just said. "He remembers everything? Everyone, but me? How is that possible?" Liv questioned. She wished she had prepared herself for this, though she didn't think there was a need to, after all Mellie hadn't mentioned anything on the phone call.

"We should talk to his doctors," Mellie said. Sure she had dreamed of a life in which Olivia didn't exist, but this was not the way she wanted it, this was like winning by default.

"Careful now," Cyrus warned. "If he doesn't remember Liv, then there's probably more he doesn't remember. If word leaks that the President is suffering from memory loss then we are all gone for," he continued.

"He's right," Liv agreed. "We need to protect him," she added.

"Protect him from what? How can we protect him if we don't know what we're dealing with? We have all been worried sick that Fitz would not wake up, and just because he's awake doesn't mean he's himself. We need to know where and when this amnesia thing starts and ends. Only then can we really protect him," Mellie said. And although she felt like she was saying the right thing, it felt strange to be on the side which favoured Fitz remembering his mistress.

"We can assess that ourselves," Cyrus said, the three of them had kept secrets about Fitz in the past what would be so different now?

"As Wife trumps Chief-of-Staff on all things relating to his medical health, the decision is mine. Now I am going to go find his doctor, you can either come with me or you can stay here," Mellie said, putting her foot down.

Before either Cyrus or Olivia could say a word the pregnant woman was walking down the hallway in search of Fitz's medical team. Olivia quickly followed after her, because although she wouldn't admit it, she was dying to know why it seemed that only she had been erased from Fitz's memory. With a large sigh, Cyrus followed too.

…

"Speaking strictly hypothetically, if Fitz did forget certain things, when is cause to worry?" Mellie asked to the head doctor working Fitz's case.

"Some names and dates may allude him until he fully recovers, and that's not a real cause for concern. A little memory loss is not uncommon in patients who have suffered this kind of head injury. We've run tests on his memory, and under the circumstances he's doing extremely well. There shouldn't be any reason he can't return to work once he's back on his feet," the doctor answered. "Though your use of 'hypothetically' does lead me to ask if you have noticed anything we should look further at?"

"Nothing," Cyrus added before anyone else could speak.

"What about faces? People? Is it possible to simply no longer remember them?" Olivia asked.

"Again hypothetically," Mellie added.

"'Hypothetically', if someone in the President's situation forgot someone else, it could be the brain protecting them. The brain is a remarkable thing and this could simply be a trigger of the flight or fight mechanism, or there's something deeper underlying. It's not always easy to tell. Has there been any signs of President Grant forgetting someone?" The doctor asked skeptically.

"We just want to know what to be on the lookout for. With his job, we can never be too careful," Mellie said trying to sound sincere, and unknowing.

"If he does forget something, simply reminding him can work, but don't push, these things usually work out on their own," the doctor added.

"Thank you," Liv, Mellie and Cyrus said in near unison. They waited for the doctor to walk off before saying a word and walking back down the hall to Fitz's room.

Mellie and Cyrus were in a small argument about what to do, but when they reached the door Liv stopped them. "I don't think we should tell him," she said at a shock to both Mellie and Cyrus. They were sure she was going to side with reminding him. "It's better this way. He can work on getting better, and being President. Adding me into the mix is just going to confuse him. There's no reason to push this on him. If he remembers on his own then so be it. But I'm not going in there and telling him about us. I can't," Liv concluded.

When he asked who she was, it was one of the worst feelings in the world, and going in there and rehashing everything was going to be too painful especially if he still didn't remember afterwards. This was the best choice for everybody. They had tried to break away from each other a thousand times in the past, maybe this was they needed to finally be able to just that.

"Are you sure?" Mellie asked.

"If he asks, don't mention anything other than I used to work with him, and we were close friends, that's all he needs to know," she said sternly, which said there was no more room for conversation.

Mellie and Cyrus nodded and then walked back into the room. Liv caught a glimpse of Fitz as the door opened, and hoped she was making the right decision. Olivia took a few steps to a bench of chairs because she knew her legs would soon give way. She had to keep reminding herself that even though this situation wasn't the way she had hoped, he was alive, he was conscious, and he would be fine. And with some time, hopefully so would she.

 **So when I wake up, it will be my birthday so please leave me a review as a present, pretty please.**

 **Also I hope you still enjoy (Dont worry they will come back together at one point or another)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the continued support, and thanks to those who wished me a happy birthday last week. I had an awesome day and it's still hard to believe I'm so old (22 for those wondering).**

Olivia walked into OPA defeated, she bypassed her staff and went straight to her office. She didn't care about the time of day, all she cared about was getting a drink into her hand and then into her stomach. Walking over to her beverage cart, she took a bottle of wine and a glass to the sofa.

When she was halfway through her glass, the door opened and Abby was standing holding onto the handle. "Is that a celebratory drink?" She asked.

"I want to be alone," Liv said, not ready to engage in conversation.

"Not a celebratory drink?"

"Go away Abby," Olivia instructed, but as Abby looked over the situation that was unfolding she knew she couldn't leave. Taking a step further into the room she closed the door behind her.

"What's happening?" Abby said taking a seat next to her friend. It wasn't uncommon to see Olivia with a glass of red in her hand, but never this early in the afternoon or at least not at the office.

Olivia glared at Abby, but realised no matter how long she kept up her stance the red-head wouldn't be leaving. Taking a large sip from her glass she took a deep breath once her mouth was empty. "Fitz woke up," Liv started.

"Then why are you acting like he's still in a coma or worse?" Abby asked trying to read her friend and the situation, but putting two and two together just wasn't making any sense.

"He doesn't know who I am," Olivia confessed, and just saying those words out loud sent a pang through her chest.

"He has no memory?" Abby asked, her eyes expanding at how detrimental this was.

"No, he remembers. He just doesn't remember me," Liv explained and then drained her glass. She grabbed for the bottle and refilled her wine, knowing that one drink wasn't going to be enough.

"That doesn't make sense, how could he not remember you?" Abby asked and then realised that probably wasn't the best question the ask Olivia right now. "I just mean how is it possible to forget only one part of your life? Is selective amnesia a thing?"

"According to the doctors," Liv said looking toward the window.

"But he will one day remember who you are?" Abby asked trying to understand the situation as a whole.

"Possibly," Liv answered, and wished the doctors could have given her a more definitive answer. It was too much to hang her hat on a flip of a coin.

"Possibly?"

"To him, I may never come back. Or it might take some time. Or he might just need to be reminded," Liv said, trying to explain the situation without giving away too many details, after all this was still mostly classified.

"Then go remind him. Go to him and tell him who you are. I'm sure there's a part of him deep down that knows who you are and what you mean to him," Abby said.

"I can't. I'm protecting him. We decided to hide the truth. This is the clean slate we both need. He deserves that much," Liv explained but Abby could tell that wasn't the whole story.

"Protecting him? Or protecting yourself?" She asked.

Olivia went silent and blinked a few times. Her eyes were stinging and her stomach felt empty. Abby noticed Liv's jaw started to tremble. Liv raised her hand to cover her mouth knowing she had been made. "He doesn't remember me, because he doesn't want to remember me. He's blocking me out for a reason, a specific reason. I can't go in there and tell him who I am, because he doesn't want to know who I am. I can't put myself through that. It's too hard. If he remembers me on his own then so be it. But I can't go in there and see that blank look again. I just can't," Olivia announced, though it pained her to say.

…

"So?" Fitz began once Mellie and Cyrus had walked back into the room. "What's going on? Who was that woman?" He asked but was met with no answer from either party. Cyrus took a seat across from the President, while Mellie went to the bed and started fussing with his blankets. "Stop Mel," he demanded hitting his wife's hands away. "Now tell me what is happening," he requested for the second time.

"Well, sir, it seems you have some minor memory loss," Cyrus explained.

"And we are going to monitor it, and make sure it doesn't go beyond what it is now," Mellie added.

"So who was she?" Fitz asked. He could guess she was someone whom he was meant to know, but for the life of him he couldn't place her.

"She worked with us on the trail and at the start of the administration," Cyrus replied, knowing what Olivia wanted.

"And now she's just an old friend who was worried about you. The whole country has been worried about you and praying for you. The support from allies has been rolling in," Mellie said trying to move the topic off of the elephant in the room.

"What's her name?"

Mellie and Cyrus glanced at each other and shared a look that agreed they would answer. "Olivia. Olivia Pope," Mellie answered. She wondered if that would be enough to jog his memory, but when she saw nothing flash across his eyes in recognition of the name she knew that he still had no recollection of his mistress.

"And I'm meant to know who she is? She wasn't just some junior staffer that I occasionally passed in the halls?" Fitz asked racking his brain for any trace of who Olivia was to him, because he knew that the two people looking at him wouldn't be this worried be if she had been a nobody.

"No sir," Cyrus said, confirming Fitz thoughts.

"Can I have some time alone? Go back to the White House, see what needs to be done to fix this whole Sally mess. I just want to sleep," Fitz instructed. He might not remember who Olivia is or was, but he knew that she was someone important, and he could guess she was someone important to him as a friend and not just a colleague. Cyrus and Mellie were too worried for just some lowly intern, but yet they weren't worried enough to be concerned about her going to the press. No Olivia wasn't just anybody, she was a somebody, and he needed to work out who she was.

 **I know its a bit slow going atm, and future chapters will be longer.**

 **I start back at uni this week, and class load and with my other story I dont know how much time i'll have to write, but i will try my damnedest to update each weekend.**

 **I love to hear your feedback about this story, so**

 **Please Review :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**I am so sorry that it's been so long since I updated this story, and I so wish I had gotten further through it. But I have been extremely busy with my last semester of uni, and all the other things building. You know how it is.**

 **I want to thank everyone who has reviewed, followed, favourites this story, it really does mean the world. And I do hope to update a lot more now that Uni is finished.**

It had been a week and a half since the worst few days of Olivia's life. She didn't want to think about Fitz. It wouldn't hurt then. But not thinking about the love of your life was easier said than done. Everything related back to him. The news had constant updates on what the President was up to. She knew he had been out of the hospital, after he had been given a clean bill of health, and was now back in the Oval. Though that was what the media had been given, it didn't mean it was the truth. She knew all too well that the press never knew the whole story. She was usually on the other side of this. She hated being on this side. But it was her choice. And it was one of the hardest decisions she had ever made.

Abby asked everyday if she had reconsidered. But how could she? Fitz didn't know who she was. The man who she loved, and who loved her couldn't recognise her from anyone else in his life. It broke her. She was broken. Her heart ripped in two. Those few words played over in her mind. Each word felt like the twisting of a knife in her stomach. On the outside she looked like Olivia Pope. But on the inside she felt like a shell of the person she had once been. Life would never be the same for her. And she wasn't ready to accept that.

What if they hadn't of fought? What if they accepted the situation they were in and just waited it out. What if she never pulled away? What if? These were the questions she would never get an answer to. And maybe it was better if she didn't. She was having a hard enough time with this, if she knew it was her fault, she would never forgive herself.

It was hard to think of a world that she and Fitz weren't whatever they were. They always had some type of relationship. Even if they hadn't seen or talk to each other in months they were still together in some way. If they were in a fight, that signified they had a relationship and a reason to give the silent treatment. There was always a reason. But this was a cruel injustice. The universe playing a sick prank on the both of them. This wasn't the way it was meant to end.

Olivia stared out the window in her office, not bothering to even attempt to get back on task. She just needed a minute, or five. Outside everything seemed like it was meant to. Nothing was out of the ordinary. The sky had the normal amount of cloud cover. She could still see into some buildings across the road. The trees swayed with the breeze, the leaves flickering like static on the television. The world was how it had always been, and yet her world couldn't feel more abnormal.

She watched as a bird tried to fly against the wind, and as it landed on a branch she heard her phone. She was almost going to ignore it when she saw the two words she didn't think she would see again brighten up her screen. White House. Liv almost pounced on her cell. She took a deep breath before answering. There was no way she could know who was calling her, or even what they were calling about. She couldn't get her hopes up. For all she knew it was some aide requesting that she hand in her pass.

"Hello?" Olivia answered anxious to know who was on the other end of the call.

"Ms Pope?" The all too familiar voice asked. There was a waver in his voice, like he wasn't too sure if he was talking to the right person. There was a time that he would know it was her by a little word like 'hi', now he had to ask for classification.

"Mr President?" Olivia replied. She had to remember she wasn't talking to her Fitz, and she had to watch what she said around him. It wasn't appropriate to call him by any nickname. Even if she had once been given permission.

"I was hoping you'd be able to come in for some time, later today or tomorrow," he stated. It wasn't really a question of if Liv could.

"May I know what this is regarding?" She could hope he was getting his memory back and just needed a push, and this was just his unique way of asking. But she also knew it was no use holding her breath.

"That's something we can discuss when you arrive. When can I expect you?" He asked.

Olivia removed the phone from her ear to look at the time. She knew she didn't have any appointments for the rest of the day, so there was no reason she couldn't go to him. But she was hesitant. She didn't love the idea of seeing this Fitz again. It was too hard. But she also needed to know what he wanted. And the hope of him remembering her was too much not to give into. "I can be there within the hour," Liv suggested.

"Excellent, I'll see you soon Ms. Pope," Fitz said, and if there was a slight second that Liv had forget the situation they were in, she was quick to remember.

...

Olivia walked through the West Wing, and watched as the workers stared at her. It felt as if she didn't belong. With the way people were staring it was as if they knew about everything. But Liv knew that was impossible. She was most likely projecting her feelings of insecurity on to them.

As she turned the last corner that would lead her into the hallway for the oval, she heard the tapping of heels along the floor. They were heavier than they once were, but when you are holding an extra twenty pounds of baby, that's too be expected. When Mellie saw Olivia her face changed. Liv could see the confusion in Mellie's eyebrows.

"What are you doing here? I thought we both agreed you would stay away," Mellie asked. It was her job to keep Liv in the loop of what was happening with Fitz. And for what she had seen nothing had changed since the hospital. But after all it wasn't unlike her husband to keep secrets from her, especially when it was regarding Olivia.

"He asked to see me. I don't know why," Liv informed Mellie.

"Does he remember?" She asked. Although at the beginning she was concern that Fitz didn't know who Liv was, now she had become accustomed to it.

"I don't think so," Liv replied, and watched as Mellie became a lot less tense. It was then she realised that Mellie wasn't on her side. How could she have been so stupid? Of course Mellie wouldn't want Olivia back in Fitz's life. She'd go on pretending as if there had never been a problem between the pair. "But I did agree to see him, and I don't want to be late for the President," Liv said as she waved Mellie off, and continued to the Oval.

She stopped herself from just walking in, like she had so many times in the past. But she waited. Lauren looked at her, she had very rarely seen this women wait to be announced, but here she was. "He's ready for you," Lauren said. Liv took a deep breath, to calm her nerves. This was so unlike her. Liv twisted the handle and took a step into the Oval.

Fitz smiled when he looked up and saw her. Maybe he did recognise her. Maybe his memory had come back and he was just lying to Mellie to keep it secret. Maybe he wanted to tell Liv face to face, because this wasn't the news you share over the phone. Maybe, just maybe, her Fitz was back.

 **What did you think.**

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	5. Chapter 5

**Woah look it hasn't been five months between updates, I told you I'd be better. I actually realised after the last chapter how in love with this concept I was and just wanted to write as soon as I could.**

 **Thank you for all the feedback, the reviews are wonderful to read and I am extremely appreciative of your comments.**

Olivia examined Fitz's smile, she'd definitely been given that smile before. It was a 'thank god you're here' smile. A 'you've just brightened my day' smile. And a sense of hope washed over Olivia. She knew that smile. That was a smile that was reserved just for her. Could this really be? Could he be back? Olivia wished with every ounce of her body that this was the case. He had to remember her. You wouldn't smile like that for a stranger. The President of the United States would not invite someone he didn't know into the Oval Office. He had to be back. There was no other option.

"Ms Pope, thank you for coming so quickly," Fitz said and again she realised all her wishes were just delusions. How could she be so stupid? Of course he still didn't know who she was.

"When the President calls, you don't leave him waiting," Liv replied, trying to hide her disappointment, but she was sure it was evident in her voice.

"I'm sure you're wondering why I asked you to come in," Fitz said as he gestured for Liv to take a seat on the sofa across from him. If he registered Liv's disappointment then he didn't let on. But of course Liv was a great actress, only people who truly knew her would be able to tell how she was really feeling. Fitz used to one of those people.

"I am," she agreed, as she sat down.

"Well I shouldn't leave you in too much suspense. After all we are both busy people. I asked you in so I could offer you a job," he said, as if it wasn't the most preposterous thing in the world.

"A job?" Liv repeated confused at his offer.

"Your old job. Communications Director," he said clarifying it. Though it didn't do much to clear things up on Olivia's end.

"You know that I was once Communications Director? I thought you didn't know who I was," Liv asked, again getting her hopes up higher than they should've been given the current situation.

"I'm sorry, I still don't. I was told you once held that position, and as the job is currently vacant, I thought you would be a good fit," Fitz said. He really did feel rude for not remembering her, even though almost everything else in his mind was clear.

"You offering me a job when you don't know who I am. That's ridiculous," Liv said, still taken a back by the offer. There was no way the old Fitz would offer her the job back. He knew and understood fully why she left. I was still hard for her to believe that no trace of her lingered in even the back of his mind.

"I obviously knew you well enough to give you the job in the first place. I know you helped out while I was in hospital. I know you can do the job," he said. He wouldn't tell her but he had done his research. He knew she hadn't been fired, so he couldn't have found her incompetent. He'd seen old tapes of her press conferences and was amazed at her ability. He knew she was the right person for the job, and that was all he needed to know.

"I'm sorry," Liv said as she looked to the floor, she couldn't look Fitz in the eye. There was no possible way to explain the real situation. And what if she did and he didn't believe her? That would be just as hard for her.

"Olivia- can I call you Olivia?" Fitz asked, and Liv slowly nodded. "I understand that you think I don't know you. Then let me know you. Tell me who Olivia Pope really is," he said. Fitz really did want to know Olivia. He'd known right away that he should've remembered her, and that it was extremely surprising to everyone around him that he didn't. The way Cyrus and Mellie acted in the hospital was unlike them. They were too shocked. Too secretive. They were obviously trying to cover something up. However no matter how hard he tried to rack his memory nothing ever came up.

Olivia let out a small chuckle. It wasn't funny, not really, but she just had to laugh at the situation. It was easier than crying, or even screaming out in pain. Maybe this could be an opening. She could tell him everything, and see if he remembered anything. It would be easier than lying to him. But she still felt restricted, and didn't think she could bare laying everything out, just to be turned down. "Okay," she replied. Fitz might not of known who Olivia was, but Olivia knew who Fitz was. And Fitz was a man how rarely took 'no' for an answer. "I was an old friend of Cyrus', and when you we're having trouble in the primaries, he called me into help," Liv began. She decided to play it safe. She would tell him about their brief professional relationship, and omit anything personal. "I helped with changing the public perception of you and Mellie," she continued, and Fitz nodded along. It was in that sentence Fitz knew he had to hire Olivia. If she made him and Mellie look good, then she could make anything look good. "I decided to stay on until the General. I was the only person willing to tell you the truth," she said, and the last word caught in her throat. It made her question if she should reconsider what she was telling him. But realised she only told the truth when it helped more than hindered. "It was the reason why you offered me the position as Communications Director, and the reason we became friends," Liv said.

"So why did you quit?" Fitz asked.

"Personal reasons," Liv half lied. There was no way she could reveal that he was the real reason.

"I see," Fitz nodded. He was I no place to ask anymore questions, and he could tell Olivia was a private person and it was probably best not to push her. Though that didn't stop him from wanting her on the team. He couldn't see how a personal problem from almost two years ago could still be a problem now. "Is there anything else you think I should know about you?" he asked eagerly.

Olivia thought for a minute. There were so many things he should know. So many things he once did. But she couldn't find the right thing to say. Everything led on to their relationship. "Nothing comes to mind," she answered.

"Alright then. I understand you have you're own firm. And I can understand not wanting to leave it. But this role wouldn't be forever. As you know my administration is going through a difficult time. I need to fill that position as soon as possible. And you are the only person in the world that knows the role and knows how things work around here. You will be doing your country a great service, and I will be extremely appreciative," Fitz said trying to persuade her.

Olivia went silent. She tried to think of this man not as Fitz but as the President. And when the President asked you to serve, you served. But the situation wasn't that simple. "I'll have an answer for you tomorrow."

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	6. Chapter 6

**I am beyond amazed by the response this story has gotten. 100 reviews already, that positively unbelievable. so thank you to everyone who has reviewed, followed, favourited. It's everything.**

 **There was a lean to one particular option if Liv should take the job or not, so I hope those who wanted the other option aren't to upset.**

Olivia sat tapping her pen on her desk. There was something she needed to be doing but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get Fitz's job offer out of her head. She kept weighing the pro's and con's of taking the job. She wished it had leaned obviously to one side. But for every con there was a pro. She wished the decision was a straight-forward one, but of course nothing about this situation was straight-forward, so why would her decision be?

"Liv," Abby said as she came into Olivia's office, not bothering to knock. "Here are the reports you asked for," she said as she handed to files to her boss.

"Thanks," Liv said and began to look them over. Abby continued to hover, she wanted to know if there was any more she could do, but really she wanted to know if there had been any developments been Liv and the President. She knew Liv had gone to see him, but had no idea what had transpired during the meeting.

Olivia had yet to notice that Abby hadn't moved. Frustrated that she hadn't been noticed, Abby turned her attention to the TV. Liv had been watching the news to distract herself but it hadn't worked too well. Fitz rarely didn't make the news, and of course his shooting was still hitting the airwaves.

"Oh, ain't this guy a hack," Abby said as she watched a press conference from the White House. "Can you believe that this is the best they could find? This guy's just a big flashing light pointing to the problems with the administration," Abby added, and waited for Liv to join in with the mocking.

"He's doing the best he can," Liv replied, and Abby's eyebrows furrowed. She knew her friend was hurting, but she didn't think she would be this tense. Making fun of Liv's replacements was their thing.

"Do you think they're looking for a proper replacement?" Abby asked, Liv used to be her eyes and ears into White House life. She could usually get a lot out of her friend. But that was before. She didn't know if that was still the case.

"Fitz already has someone in mind," Liv answered. She wasn't sure if she should tell her friend or not, but she needed someone to tell her how irrational it would be to take the job.

"He does? Who?" Abby questioned.

"Me," Liv said and watched Abby's reaction. Liv could tell Abby was surprised. Obviously not as much as Olivia had been when Fitz asked her, but still up there on the shock scale.

"You?" Abby needed to make sure she had heard Olivia right.

"He offered me the job," Olivia confirmed letting out a breath. It was weird to say out loud. She even hoped that just saying it aloud would help her make her decision. Verbalising things usually did help her. It made it seem real, and that it wasn't all in her head.

"He offered you the job?" Abby said still processing it. She couldn't imagine Olivia returning to the White House. Or even the President asking Liv back. But then she also couldn't imagine the President being shot and losing his memory. But it happened. So nothing was out of the realm of possibility.

"Well, my old job," Liv corrected.

"Your old job?" Abby asked again, as if expecting Liv to shout out that she was joking.

"Can you please stop repeating everything I'm saying?" Liv requested. It was starting to get annoying.

"Sorry," Abby said breaking the mimicking spell she was under. "It's just, he really doesn't remember," she continued voicing her thoughts without a buffer.

"Thank you for reminding me," Olivia sighed. It wasn't as if she forgot. There was no way that that piece of information would slip out of her head. It would be a lot easier if she, like Fitz, could forget. But barring a bullet in her brain, she knew that wasn't possible.

"So?" Abby asked as she sat down. She needed to know what Liv was thinking. Olivia was not the simplest person to read. And even after so many years of knowing her, she could still surprise her.

"So what?" Liv asked, not sure what Abby was referring to.

"Are you going to take it?" Abby questioned.

"I don't know," Liv answered honestly. She was lost. She had never been this lost. Not when she decided to leave the White House, not when she fell in love with Fitz. Not even when she found out he had been shot. Her brain and her heart were pulling her in completely different directions. And she didn't know which was the right one to listen to. A week ago she had agreed to walk away from Fitz, for that had been the easiest thing to do, but now she wasn't so sure she was right.

"You don't know?" Abby said in shock. There were very few times that Olivia Pope didn't know what she was going to do. She always had a plan. She always knew ten steps in front.

"Abby!" Liv exclaimed, She really wanted was for the repeating to stop. Olivia took a deep breath, stood up and turned the TV off. "I told him I would have an answer for him today, and I still don't know what to do. I was thinking about it all last night. But nothing is clear. How could it be?" she admitted.

"So what are you thinking? I know you. You have to have some thoughts," Abby said, she wanted to help Liv, she hated seeing her in this much pain, and if she had to be a sounding board to help, then so be it.

"I want Fitz to remember me, and maybe this is the only way," Liv admitted and began to pace back and forth. "But then I think 'what's the point, there's a reason he doesn't remember me', and I don't want to face that reason. Also at the hospital Mellie seemed just as concerned that he didn't remember me, and yesterday she was worried that he did. She's not going to tell me anything. I'm going to have to find out myself," Liv explained. These were just some of the thoughts that had be spinning around her head. Abby nodded along trying to follow what Olivia was saying. "And what about my duty to this country, and the administration I helped get elected. I cant just leave them with some baffling idiot as their spokesperson. But I've done my part. It shouldn't be up to me. I have my own business now, I have to think about that and you and everyone else. I can't just leave. But I loved working at the White House, and the job was fast and important and something I crave, and I only left because of Fitz, and he's no longer the problem he once was. And he's assured me that my employment would just be a Band-Aid solution until they find the right person for the role permanently. And that's all well and good, but do I really want to make that change if its only going to be for a few months, it seems like a lot of hassle, with no reward. Like I said, I don't know what to do," Liv said finally coming to a halt. Abby felt like she got a new look into the inner workings of Olivia's brain. And she thanked God that she wasn't in this position, because she wasn't sure if she could make it.

"Do you want my opinion?" Abby asked. She could see Liv was stressing. She'd never seen Liv rant like that and knew different measures needed to be taken.

"Please," Liv said as she sat back down.

"There's no right or wrong option here. Either way you win, either way you lose. Don't think about anyone else, but you. What do you really want? If you want to go back, Harrison and I can hold down the fort. If you want to stay, will you be able to live with the 'what ifs'?" Abby asked. 'What ifs' could be someone's downfall, just as much as living in the past. She didn't want to see Liv fall into that.

Olivia looked down at the ring on her left pointer finger and slowly slid it off. She marvelled it as she held it in her hand. Opening her desk drawer up she placed the ring safely on top of some papers. "Alright," she smiled. Abby made the decision look simple, and Olivia decided to only look at it as if it was. "Thanks Ab," Liv smiled knowing she had finally made her choice.

Abby realised that she was no longer needed and left the way she came. Olivia waited until her friend had closed the door, before picking up her cell phone. She scrolled down until she found he right number, she couldn't use the direct line, so she had to call his secretary. Thankfully she didn't have to wait too long to be transferred to Fitz.

"Ms Pope, I've been anxiously waiting for your call all day," Fitz said as he answered his phone.

"I'm sorry I didn't call earlier, Mr President," Liv said. It was foreign for her to call him that, almost as foreign as it was to hear him call her Ms Pope.

"Perfectly fine, it's a big decision," he said.

"You have no idea," Liv muttered, and then remembered he could hear her. "Sorry, you're right, it was."

"Was? Does that mean you have decided?" He asked eager to hear what he hoped he would.

"I have," Olivia announced. "I'll be there tomorrow."

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bThanks for reading.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey Guys, I'm still amazingly impressed by the response this story had gotten. it really is giving me the warm and fuzzy feelings. so thank you!**

Olivia had been working back as Communications Director for a day, and she had forgotten the speed that the White House worked at. She thought OPA was fast, but as she was the boss she had a lot more freedom, and she only realised how much of a luxury that was now. She had spent the day catching up on all the procedures that had come into play since she had left, and she had to refresh herself on everything the job entailed.

By nine o'clock she was beat. She wanted to go home, but she knew if she didn't want to waste another day catching up, than she had to work through to at least eleven o'clock. Olivia hadn't seen Fitz yet, and that was probably for the best. She wanted to have as much time to adjust to the situation before adding in that level of difficulty. She knew it wouldn't be like how it was before. There was no way. Fitz and Liv had a way of knowing what the other wanted, or was going to say. They were on the same team, they did whatever it was to make the other's work easier. However, that was all gone now. She might know how Fitz thinks, but there was no way he could say the same thing for her. Not to mention this Fitz was not the same man as her Fitz. He didn't necessary think the same, or do the same, so that left her out in the cold.

There was no way this Fitz would take her to look at the Declaration of Independence, or know where their spot in the Rose Garden was. He wouldn't know how sitting in his arms made Olivia feel safe, or how she smiled when they were first 'inappropriate'. He wouldn't take Olivia's point to heart like he once did. He wouldn't side with her because she was Olivia and he loved her. He wouldn't call her in the middle of the night, just so he could hear her voice. He wouldn't be able to soothe her worries like he did. The love of her life was gone, and she still hadn't accepted it yet.

Knowing that her back would never forgive her if she continued sitting hunched over in the desk chair, Olivia moved over to sofa with a bunch of files. She turned on the lamp that sat on the small coffee table on the side, and it lit up the area. Aside from the light she had just turned on, and the one on her desk, the room was dark. It changed from day to night while she immersed in some paperwork and hadn't found the need or the energy to get up to turn the overhead light on.

It wasn't long before the lack of light, and her lack of enthusiasm to keep going, put her to sleep. It was while she was a sleep she could picture the world the way it was meant to be. She dreamed of Fitz knocking on her apartment door in the middle of the night because he needed to see her. He'd never been shot, and knew exactly who she was, and who she was to him. She pulled him to her bedroom and helped unbutton his dress shirt as she did. As her fingers traced up and down his bare chest, Fitz found a hold on Olivia and effortlessly picked her up and threw her down on to her bed. He hovered over her, smiling while he took in her beauty. He began to lower him self down ready to close the distance between their mouths.

There was a knock on the door and it quickly pulled Olivia out of her fantasy. She looked up and was beyond shocked to see Fitz standing there. " Fi- Mr President," Olivia said, as she quickly stopped herself from slipping up. "Is there something I can help you with?" She asked, not knowing any real reason that he would be standing in her doorway.

"I didn't know I hired you to sleep," he said as he stepped into her office.

"I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again," Liv apologised as she picked up the files that had fallen to the ground while she napped.

"Olivia, I was joking," Fitz laughed, and Liv was happy to see that she had helped create a genuine smile on his face. It had been so long since she had really seen that. But it was bittersweet. "I'm actually surprised you're still here," he added.

"I thought it important to be up to date as quickly as possible. And if that means a few late nights in the office, than so be it," she replied. There was an awkward feeling hoovering over her. She wanted to fall into the pattern of conversation they once had, the one when they could talk open and honestly, and not this one where coming up with something to say felt forced.

"Not if it means you're the last person working. You're going to put me to shame," Fitz said, he'd finished working a while ago. Now he was roaming the halls of the West Wing so not to go up to the Residence.

"I'd usually take some work home with me, but I thought it best not to have any wine distractions," Liv admitted. She wanted to see if slipping little things about her into conversation would work. And nothing said Oliva Pope like a glass of expensive wine.

"You're a wine drinker?" He asked, and Liv realised that it hadn't triggered anything in his mind about her.

"Red," she nodded and watched as Fitz waked further into the room, shutting the door behind him. He turned the chair across from her desk to face the sofa, and took a seat.

"So, you work late, or take it home with you, wouldn't you rather be having some sort of social life?" Fitz said changing the topic completely. It surprised Olivia, she didn't think this Fitz would be so open with a near total stranger.

Olivia wasn't sure she should enter this line of conversation, but then another part convinced her that there would be no harm if she did. "I did have a boyfriend, but you know," she said hoping that would be enough. It wasn't all that common for people to ask more than that.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Fitz said, which of course was the polite response when someone thought they had intruded too much.

"It's not your fault," Liv replied. And it wasn't. She was sure if her Fitz had a real choice he wouldn't have chosen this. He wouldn't have wanted to be shot and forget part of his memory. Especially the part that involved her.

"Well, can I just say your boyfriend was an idiot," he admitted, and it made Olivia chuckle at the irony. She couldn't believe he, of all people, had just said that. Liv wondered that if or when he got his memory back he would remember this moment and kick himself. Though she could imagine him kicking himself for much more obvious reasons than this.

"Thanks," Olivia smiled, she was actually enjoying herself. This Fitz had all the charm and cockiness that her Fitz did. And she was beyond glad he hadn't forgotten that part of himself.

"I don't think I've ever seen your smile," Fitz said and Liv's smile slowly faded as she was brought back to reality yet again. It seemed impossible to forget, and fall back into how they used to be. There was always something that was lurking near the surface ready to interrupt her happiness. "I'm sorry," Fitz said reading Olivia's face. He didn't mean to make her uncomfortable. "It's just you have a beautiful smile, and more people should see it," he admitted, hoping she wouldn't take offense.

"It's okay," she said and gave him small smile so he wasn't to worry. She didn't want this playful Fitz to go away. It was like he was almost in reach. But then again he also wasn't. She could tell he still had no real recollection of her, or them as a couple. "I, ah, was actually thinking of heading home. There's no reason to spend the night on the couch when I have a perfectly good bed at home," Liv said finding a way out, she knew if this conversation when on for too long, it would become awkward and lagging. And in true Olivia Pope fashion, she wanted to leave him wanting more.

"Absolutely. There's nothing you can do tonight that will be worse off if you left it until morning," Fitz said and then stood up and pushed the chair back to its original position. "Goodnight Olivia. I'll see you tomorrow.

"Goodnight Mr President."

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	8. Chapter 8

**Let me say, I am still unbelievably shocked at the turn out for this story. Thank you to everyone who is reviewing, you're amazing, and I really hope this story lives up to your expectations.**

Olivia sat in her office for the second night in a row. She hadn't been as productive as she had planned to be. Not to mention every time someone knocked on her door she hoped it would be Fitz. She hoped she had made some sort of impact on him last night, but she had yet to see him today. Of course he was busy, and she hadn't made any attempt for a meeting. So it was mostly her fault. But she didn't feel right making a meeting if she had nothing to discuss with him. Once upon a time, they would have had ten meetings by now, and very little discussion would have been had.

Olivia heard a knock on the door, and again hoped it was Fitz, and for the first time all day her wish was granted. She gave a quick smirk at the sight of him, and waved Fitz in. "I wish I was surprised to see you here," Fitz said as he pushed the glass door open. "Should I expect this to be a normal occurrence?" He asked as he took the seat across from Olivia. Fitz had been holding something but he had placed it on the floor before Olivia could sneak a proper glance.

"For the most part," Liv answered with a grin.

"So, let me get this straight. You work hard all day and so far work longer hours than I do. You're the best in your field, and can handle a group of reporters like no one else can. And I let you go?" He asked. Given her work ethic and ability he couldn't believe that she no longer worked for him. It seemed preposterous.

That last question hit a nerve with Olivia, but she couldn't let it show. He had let her go. Not from the job obviously, but from his memory. "But I resigned," Liv said not expressing how hurt she had been by that previous question.

"But you came back, that's the important part. There's not many people who would come back to a job they had grown out of in a crisis. But that speaks to your character, and I, and the administration, will forever be in your debt," Fitz said, taking Olivia aback, she wasn't expecting to hear those words come out of Fitz's mouth.

"Thank you," she said whole heartedly.

"Which is why I got you a present," Fitz said as he leaned over to pick up what he had brought in.

"You really didn't need to get me anything, I'm happy to help" she said out of politeness. She really didn't know what he could be giving her, it wasn't as if he knew what she liked.

"I could take it back," he joked as he held the bottle by the neck for Olivia to see.

"No, that's fine, I'll take it," Olivia said gleefully as she examined the label. It was a good brand. Expensive. Something she would pick for herself. For a second she had a glimmer of hope that he remembered her, though then she remembered that she told him last night that she drunk red wine, so again her hopes were crushed. She reached out to take the bottle. Her fingers grazed his, it was the first time, minus a hand shake, they had touched since he was lying in the hospital bed unconscious. Olivia's hand lingered, and Fitz didn't pull away. Olivia put it down to not wanting to drop the bottle and he wasn't sure if she had a proper grip, so she quickly pulled it away. "This is a good year," Liv said upon closer inspection of the label.

"In all honesty, I had an aide go out and get it for me," Fitz confessed with a grin.

"You mean you didn't take a break from your extremely important job, and take an unplanned trip to get a new employee a present? Mr President, I'm shocked," Olivia said in a faux dramatic tone, causing Fitz's grin to grow even larger. He liked how playful Olivia was with him, he didn't have this with anyone else. He could tell Olivia was special.

"Not to assume you'd share, or want to drink it now, but I also bought in two glasses," Fitz said as he bent down and picked up another thing he came in with.

"But you're not a wine drinker," Liv said a little confused. Scotch yes, a glass of merlot not so much.

"We can all make sacrifices," he said as he placed the two glasses on Olivia's desk.

"I hope you have a cork screw, it's not something I typically keep in my top drawer," Liv replied. It was true, at OPA it was in the third drawer down. Fitz again leaned over and picked up the bottle opener. "You really do come prepared," Liv smiled. She like that he just assumed that she would be up to sharing a drink with him. "It's a good thing almost everyone has gone home for the night, this wouldn't be a good example to set," Liv joked as she passed Fitz back the bottle.

"That's why I like this time of night. I can walk around the West Wing and truly enjoy it. There's no one hassling me to do something, no ones looking like a deer in headlights just because they weren't expecting to see me. Everyone's usually so stressed around me. All wanting to make a good impression, as if what I think about them is going to validate their life and career," Fitz said as he opened the bottle and started to pour the two glasses.

"You're the President, that can be intimidating," Olivia said explaining how the rest of the world would have felt around Fitzgerald Grant.

"You're not intimidated around me," Fitz said as he handed over the glass to Olivia.

"But I helped you get elected, without me you wouldn't have made it through the primaries, makes the magic go away," Olivia answered. She and Fitz both took a sip from their glass at the same time, and silence filled the room.

"Tell me the truth, what sort of relationship did we have before?" Fitz blurted out, he'd been wondering that since he saw her come into his hospital room.

"What do you mean?" Liv asked playing coy. He might say he wanted the truth, but he wasn't ready for it, not yet, not really.

"You say that you, Cyrus, Mellie and I were old friends," Fitz began and Olivia nodded in agreement. She wondered where this was going, if he didn't believe what they had told him, then maybe there was a part of him that knew the truth, even if he didn't remember it all. "Yet, my wife seemed extremely displeased, even angry, that I had hired you. It just doesn't add up. There's something you're all not telling me, and it has something to do with you," he finished.

Olivia looked down, not ready to meet his gaze. He was definitely not a stupid man. But something in Olivia told her that Fitz was still not ready for the whole truth, or maybe she wasn't. "Okay, you're right, Mellie and I have a complicated relationship. We're friends one minute, and enemies the next. It isn't always easy to see when she flips. It's usually when she wants something from me. It first started when we were on the trail. You two were spending a lot more time together, and had to over pretend that you were the happiest of couples. When the curtain came down, you'd come to me for a distraction. We became fast friends, close friends. You'd confide in me, bounce ideas of me. We became the team that Mellie thought you and she should have been. She was jealous, I guess. She wanted what we had. And when I resigned, she thought she was going to get that, but you'd still come to me with major problems. When you were shot, Mellie and I banded together to help you. I don't know how her mind works, it might even be the hormones, but when you forgot who I was, she must have thought it was her turn to be your partner," Liv answered, constantly stopping to take a sip. She hoped what she had just said would answer his question to the degree he so pleased.

"My wife is definitely complicated, to say the least," Fitz said as he took another sip from his glass. "But why didn't you all just tell me this?" he asked, I didn't seem like the big deal they were making it.

"Who did you expect to tell you? You don't know who I am past a week ago. And Mellie isn't one to broadcast her insecurities," Olivia said, the strange thing was she didn't lie to him, well aside from a lie of omission. But everything she just said was the truth, not the whole truth, but one she thought the both of them could handle.

"If we were such close friends, why don't I know who you are?" he asked, it wasn't that he didn't believe what Olivia was saying, he just didn't see how he could forget about her. It seemed like everyone was trying to prank him.

"I can answer that as well as you can," Olivia answered. Not her, nor Fitz, nor a doctor could truly answers that, not yet anyway. She decided to give him the same amount of knowledge as she had in this situation. "But if I had to guess, it's because we had a fight a week before you were shot. We weren't speaking or seeing each other. And I guess your brain decided to shut me out because of that," Liv added. She thought he had a right to know about that, it could help explain things to him.

"What were we fighting about?" He asked. He racked his brain for this memory of Olivia, but like normal nothing hit.

"Honestly I don't remember. So much has happened since then, that it seems unimportant in comparison," Liv said, however she did remember, but the fight topic hindered the narrative of them being just friends.

"Right," Fitz replied. He did think Olivia was hiding something, it seemed a bit strange for a fight to be big enough to cause a riff between them and possibly be the cause of his selective amnesia, but yet small enough that she no longer remembered what it was about. But then again he had no reason not to trust her. If she said it wasn't important then he had to believe her. And he was going to. "Do you want another?" Fitz asked as he looked down at Olivia's near empty glass.

"It's probably best if I didn't," she answered. If it was a month ago, and if they were anywhere else, she wouldn't have had any objections to downing the bottle. But they were here and now, and it didn't seem like a good idea. Who knows what she would say if she had too many drinks around him. Her cool calm and collected demeanour would cease to exist. And if she told Fitz now about their real relationship he would never truly trust her knowing she had lied to him so easily.

"Probably," he agreed and began to stand up. He knew Mellie would be wondering where he was, and he didn't want to get into another disagreement with his wife. "Well until tomorrow, Olivia," he said as he went to leave.

"Until tomorrow, Mr President."

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	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys, I know its been a very long time since I updated, and believe me I feel bad about it. But there is a good reason. Since I last updated I have moved house three times (approx a month in each). I moved to a different state, and have finally gotten settled into my own apartment. I felt I could not write when I was living with a lot of people (Kind of need to be alone to write) as I always felt the need to be socialising with who I was living with. The reason I moved states is because I started studying again, and the course I wanted was not offered in my home town (this might not sound big cause I know people move for uni/college all the time, but in Australia its very rarely done- unless you live in the outback- which I did not)**

 **So again I am very sorry for taking so long, I'm sure I've lost some readers, I hope not but I'm sure its inevitable with such a long hiatus. Well that's all I can think of. Enjoy.**

Abby sat at her desk. Business had been slow since all their clients had found out Olivia had gone back to the White House. Oliva Pope and Associates without Olivia Pope was just And Associates, and their clients wanted a name. A name of someone they could rely on. Though there were a few people who still needed their help. They were the clients who's problems weren't big, but that meant they didn't pay big either. But the work meant that, she, Harrison, Quinn and Huck didn't have to twiddle their thumbs waiting for Olivia to return, and that was better than nothing.

The ding of the elevator and the slamming of the door got her attention and as she looked up she saw Olivia speeding through OPA. "Liv, what are you doing here? Aren't you meant to be at the White House?" Abby asked.

"I can't be there right now," Liv answered, she was so tense, Abby could see she was obviously shaken.

"What happened? Is it the President?" She asked. She had to know, not only because she liked gossip, but because she wanted to help her friend out.

"It's nothing. I just want to sit in my office and just be alone for awhile," Liv said as she walked into her office. Liv went straight for the drinks cart, she needed something to take the load off, and anything that had a large amount of alcohol sounded like a swell idea to her. She opened the bottle of whiskey and poured herself a double. She downed that quickly before pouring herself another and walked over and sat down on the sofa.

Olivia was finally able to take a well deserve breath, but that was when Abby walked into her office, and began towering over her. "I never comment on your drinking habits, mostly because that means you're not perfect, and I need to remind myself of that every so often. Plus everyone needs a vice, and that includes you. And although I've seen you down a bottle of red in a half hour, I've never seen you come into the office at 2pm and try to find an answer at the bottom of the glass. So you need to spill. Now," Abby said taking the glass out of Olivia's hand.

"I'm your boss, you can't talk to me like that," Liv said, as she tried to take the glass back, but Abby pulled it away.

"Actually, you work for the White House, meaning you can't work here. I have no boss. At most your just a disgruntled friend who lacks reflex's. Now tell me what's wrong," Abby said, and Liv pursed her lips.

"I can still fire you," Liv retorted.

"But you won't," Abby said. "Is it about the President?"  
Liv let go of a deep sigh she was holding, before answering. "Yes," she said, and Abby handed Liv her glass back.

"Alright, what's happened now?" Abby asked as she sat on the sofa next to Olivia.

 _Liv was waiting in Fitz's secretary's office, she finally had something to discuss with the President, and had made a meeting right away. He had a light day, so it didn't take long to get an appointment with him. This was abnormal to Liv. When she first worked at the White House, he would moved heaven and hell to have the meeting with her as soon as possible. But now she had to wait. She didn't have the right to walk into his office whenever she felt like it or had something to discuss, now she had to wait as if she was an aide or something._

 _"He'll see you now," Lauren said, and Olivia stood up and walked over to the door the secret service agent was standing outside of._

 _When he opened the door for her, Olivia was half expecting Cyrus to be in the Oval with Fitz. But surprisingly it was just the President. They were going to be alone. And although being alone isn't that new for them, not in this life or the old one, it was the first time they would be alone in the Oval since he was shot._

 _"Olivia," Fitz said happily seeing his communications director coming into his office. "What can I do for you?"_

 _"There's been a lot of questions about your health, and of course that's to be expected but I was wondering what you thought about it," Liv said as she came to stand in front of his desk._

 _"What I think about my health? I think it's good. Aside from having been shot a short time ago, I think it's as expected," Fitz replied._

 _"That's good, sir. But not exactly what I was thinking. I want to know what angle we should take with the media," Liv opened the files that she was holding and passed them over to Fitz. "You see, there's a few approaches we could take. Be it the put you in front of camera's and let you do a few interviews, or let you go on the road to show the country and the world how you really are," Liv explained._

 _Liv walked around to the side of his desk so she could show him the plans a little better. She pointed to which news outlets would take the interview, and who would be the best choice of interviewer. She showed him what states and cities they would hit, if that was the option he wanted to take._

 _Fitz's hand fell to the small of Liv's back. She had to take a few deep breaths to not overreact. His thumb started to brush up and down caressing her ever so gently. His touch was soft, and it was all Liv could do not to fall into it._

 _"Which would you do? Which do you think is right?" Fitz asked and Liv stepped away from him to get another file, but really it was to remove his hand from her._

 _"There's benefits to both. I think you should look them both over. Maybe talk to Cyrus, and come back to me with a decision. These are drafts, once you've decided what you want to do, I'll flesh out that one a lot more. And if you excuse me," Liv said as she backed out the room slowly._

 _"Olivia?" Fitz called, making Liv stop._

 _"Yes sir?"_

 _"Are you okay?" he asked, wondering what he had done that made her leave so quickly._

 _"Fine. I just have another meeting to get to. Outside the White House," Liv said as she continued on her way to the door, and left._

"I don't get it," Abby said after Liv had finished explaining. "So the President touched your back, what's the big deal? He's done a lot more than that to you," Abby said.

"That's the problem. It's not a big deal. It was nothing. It was innocent. He didn't know what he was doing. It was a reflex. Or was it? He doesn't know who I am. If this was a month ago, it'd be normal. In all honesty it probably would have led to something more. But it's now. Was it a reflex? Did something jolt in his brain and make him do it. Or was it something else? What if he does this to everyone? What if I really was nothing special? And because he doesn't know who I am, he doesn't need to pretend. And what if I'm reading too much into this. Hoping for something that didn't even happen. Maybe he didn't touch me. Maybe it was a ghost of a memory for me. What if I'm making a big deal about something that hasn't even crossed his mind?" Liv spewed out.

"That's a lot of questions that I can not answer," Abby said only now understanding the severity of the problem.

"Me either. And it's beyond frustrating," she replied. Liv looked down at her glass and rested her forehead in her hand. It was now she chose to break down. Abby could hear the quiet sobs. And even though Liv tried to muffle them they were still audible. "I just thought it would be easier. I thought I could handle this. I thought I wouldn't come crying at the first touch," Liv said as she wiped away the tears. Her eyes were stained red, and she could guess they were bloodshot.

Abby waited for Liv to become quiet. "Do you want my opinion?"

"No," Liv answered as she took a sip of her whiskey. "Yes," she said quickly changing her mind.

"You need to wipe your face, and you need to go back to the White House and talk to the President. Tell him that it was inappropriate, and that it can never happen again, or you will quit. You need to set up boundaries," Abby explained.

"Or?" Liv asked hoping there was another option.

"Or you tell him the truth."

 **What will Olivia do. Is she overreacting. Why did Fitz touch her?**

 **What did you think?**

 **Please Review :D**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey guys look, it didn't take three months for me to update, are you proud of me? I am. Thank You for the unbelievable feedback I love reading it so much, so again thank you it means so much.**

 **Enjoy!**

Olivia stared down at her glass, the liquid swirled around the bottom. It just kept going around and around until she stopped it. If that wasn't a metaphor for her life she didn't know what was. But unlike a moving glass in her hand, she couldn't just stop. She had the opportunity when Fitz ceased to know who she was, but she decided it wasn't time. Olivia took the remnants in her mouth and set the glass back down. "I take it back, I don't want your advice," Liv said standing up and walking passed Abby.

Abby couldn't say anything before Liv reached her office door. And no sooner had she walked out she was in the elevator on the ground floor of the building. From here Olivia didn't know where to go. She had three options. 1. Walk around aimlessly. 2. Go home. Or 3. Go back to the White House. Sadly none of the options seemed optimal. Walking around seemed pointless, though it could help her in by getting her thoughts worked out. Going home was unprofessional and would be retreating, and Liv didn't retreat from a fight. But going back to the White House meant she would have to see Fitz and she wasn't ready for that.

Waving down a cab, Liv knew she had to make a decision soon. "Where to?" The driver asked as Olivia hopped in the back of the taxi.  
It took a brief moment, but Liv got the words out, and no sooner had she, they were pulling away from the curb and were on their way.

...

It hadn't taken long to get from OPA to the White House, but when she did she scattered quickly to her office after passing security so not to be seen. It probably wasn't the best idea to work with alcohol in her system, but she was someone who could handle her liquor and given a half an hour and a few glasses of water she would be fine.

Once she felt like her regular self Olivia got an idea in her head. And began executing it instantaneously. She walked down the hallway, just hoping Fitz wouldn't jump out of his office and grab her. Finally, and with no Fitz attack, she made it to her destination.  
After getting the go ahead from Cyrus' assistant, Liv walked into his office. She had a few questions to asked and hoped her good friend could give her the answers she was so desperately seeking.

"Olivia, how can I help you?" Cyrus asked upon seeing his old student.

"I was just wondering if you had an opinion on the public perception strategy I discussed with the President earlier?" She asked. She had asked Fitz to talk it over with his Chief-of-Staff and hoped he had followed instruction.

"I think it would be best if we went with the interviews option. I wouldn't be able to go on the trip, so we should keep the President in the White House. That way we can monitor everything going on with him a lot more closely," Cyrus replied.

"What does Fitz want?" Liv asked, assured she was only hearing what Cyrus wanted.

"The President, has taken what I have said under advisement, and you will have an answer soon enough." Cyrus put extra emphasis on 'The President', to remind Liv that he wasn't Fitz to her anymore.

"Okay, I'll start working up the plans," she conceded.  
This was normally where Liv would turn around and leave, but she didn't move. Noticing this Cyrus had to ask. "Is there anything else?"

"Yeah...Has he said anything?" Liv asked.

"About?" Cyrus questioned, not sure what Olivia was referring to.

"Remembering me. Has he mentioned anything about that to you?" She asked, though she wasn't sure what answer she was hoping for.

"I think you'd know about that before me," Cyrus said not even bothering to look up at Liv. If he had, he would have noticed the utter confusion splashed across her face.

"That's just it, I'm not sure," Liv confessed, causing Cyrus to finally look away from what he was reading.

"Ah," was all Cyrus could say. "Did you know my life is a hell of a lot easier since you two are no longer a thing? Which is why I was obviously against him hiring you back, but unlike Mellie I wasn't stupid enough to voice my opinions. So no, Olivia he hasn't mention anything about you to me, and if he had, I wouldn't tell you," Cyrus continued to Olivia's shock.

"Right," was all Liv could say, she was slightly dumbfounded, she didn't think Cyrus would think like that, but obviously she was wrong. Before either of them could say anything else, Liv exited Cyrus' office.

...

What Cyrus had said had really hit a nerve with Olivia. Of course Cyrus felt that way, why wouldn't he. There wasn't nothing Cyrus liked more than having the President all to himself, and with the selective amnesia Fitz had given him exactly that.  
She wanted to screw with Cyrus, to show him that she would not disappear, that she wouldn't back down, but that was easier said than done. Two months ago, she could beat Cyrus with her eyes closed and her hands tie behind her back, but now he had the advantage in the situation. She didn't know when, she didn't know how, but she would get him back in his rightful position. She didn't care about the power, she cared about Fitz having it, and with Cyrus leading the way he did not have it. But what she wanted could not outweigh what she was actually going on. She couldn't ignore the situation with Fitz and move on. She needed to face it, but she wasn't ready.

Olivia looked at the clock on the wall, it had just hit five. Normally that would mean nothing. That was the time normal people went home. Normal people who worked in an office building with cubicles, and had proper functioning relationships. She was anything but normal. But tonight she had to be. If she left at five she could escape Fitz. He had been coming into her office each night for the past week. But tonight that couldn't happen. She couldn't be in the same space with him. It was awkward and she wasn't ready to face it. All she needed was the night. In the morning she would return and she could forget about it. But forgetting it right now was not possible. So she had to leave.

Olivia packed up her bag, and was out of her office as quick as can be. But it wasn't soon enough. "Olivia," Fitz called out as he walked down the corridor. Liv stopped walking knowing there was no escaping him now. "I was just coming to your office," he said as he caught up to Liv.

"I was just leaving," Liv said not meeting Fitz's gaze.

"For the night?" He asked surprised. He hadn't known Olivia long, but since she had started working at the White House she hadn't left at a normal hour once.

"Yes, Sir," Olivia said.

Fitz noticed straight away that there was something off with Olivia, he noticed it in his office earlier and he noticed it now. "Have I done something?" Fitz asked.

"No, Mr President," Liv answered, she couldn't say it if he didn't know, and she definitely couldn't say it out in the hallway for everyone to hear.

"Why do I get the impression that isn't true?" He asked. Liv looked up for the first time, and it truly seemed like he didn't know. Maybe he thought he had done nothing wrong earlier, or maybe he honestly didn't know how he had touched her. Liv wanted to answer but she couldn't do it out here.

"How about we talk in my office," Fitz said sensing Olivia's hesitation to be forthcoming.

Liv wasn't sure that was such a good idea, though she followed him anyway. They walked silently until they reached the Oval. Fitz took to one of the sofas and Olivia sat on the opposite one. This was already awkward.

"I understand all this has been difficult for you," Fitz began. Liv was glad he had taken the reigns, she wasn't sure what she would have started with.

"Yes, Sir," Liv said.

"And I'll never fully understand how difficult that really is. However I thought we were making progress. But you've seemed to have reverted back. Back to what I don't know. Maybe this is who you really are. Maybe since you've been at the White House you've been pretending, and you've now stopped. I don't know. But I would like some explanation," Fitz said. He didn't know if he should be tact with Olivia or not, and if he knew her better he would have known the right approach to take. But alas he was no longer privy to that piece of information, so he had to take the bluntest option as to get the truth fast.

"You touched my back," Liv said, there was a way she could explain it without the truth, but she didn't want to lie to him, he actually seemed to want to know what was happening, and it seemed only cruel to not let him in on the problem.

"I'm sorry?" It wasn't an apology, he generally didn't understand what Olivia was talking about.

"When I was in your office earlier, you touched my back," Liv explained.

"Was it just a graze?" he asked, though he was sure that wouldn't make Olivia react like this.

"No. It was full on contact. Something you would do to a romantic partner when your walking through a crowd, as if you we're claiming them as your own, that sort of thing," Liv said, and she carefully watched Fitz's reaction, and it wasn't one she was expecting. He laughed.

"I really don't know what you're talking about," Fitz said.

"Why is it funny?" Liv asked, she wished she could see the humour in the situation, it just escaped her.

"It's not. I just really don't remember that," he said. It had to be something about Olivia, because his mind held no recollection of that event.

"Have you been forgetting anything else?" Liv asked worried. Maybe this was a symptom of something worst. She knew it happened, and if he didn't remember something from earlier in the day, then something could be seriously wrong.

"No, just you," he said trying to lighten the mood, but it didn't work. "Sorry, that was insensitive. I don't think you're lying, maybe I did touch you, but I swear it was not on purpose, maybe I thought I was touching the back of my chair, I don't know. I can't explain something I can't remember. So for that I apologise," he said, and Liv actually believed him. Though now she knew she had been overreacting earlier.

"No, I'm sorry for bringing it up," Liv said, though she wasn't sorry. She needed to get answers and now she had them, it felt like things could return to how they were before.

"Don't be. I would like us to be honest with each other," he said, and a pang of guilt went through Olivia because she knew she couldn't live up to that on her end. However she liked that he wanted to be honest with her, and couldn't let him down.

"I'd like that," she said agreeing to the terms. "But in saying that, there's something I need to tell you," she said and Fitz's ears perked up wanting to know what it could possibly be. Fitz gave her the go ahead to talk. "In my professional opinion I believe for the public perception plan we should go out on the road, show everyone you're healthy. Don't tell the world, show them," Liv finished. She wasn't lying, this was the best option, it just so happened that it came with the added benefit of saying 'screw you Cyrus' if Fitz happened to agree.

"Alright then, if that's what you really believe start setting it up."

 **So what do you think? Is going away on the road a good idea for the pair? Did Olivia do the right thing? Should she have used her feud with Cyrus to practically manipulate Fitz, even if it was what she honestly believed? Will they actually go on the road? What will happen on the road if they do go? hmm...so many questions!**

 **Please Review :D**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey Guys, apologies for no new chapter last week, I went back to home to graduate from University. So now I am officially a university graduate, so yeah that's why there was no chap last weekend.**

 **But I do hope you enjoy this one.**

Fitz found that his and Olivia's conversation the other day had really helped. She seemed less reserved, as if she had been stepping on eggshells. She seemed more like the Olivia who he had come to know since she'd been working with him. She was the only person he felt didn't have a second agenda. He could usually see that in his employees. He could see it in Cyrus, he just usually chose to ignore it, until he worked out what his true motives were.

He liked that Olivia didn't over step her duties. She stuck to what was required of her. So many people would try to make their name known in Washington, but she wasn't like that. Maybe it was because she was already as big as she wanted to be. Or she really was invested in helping the administration back up on his feet. Fitz respected that. It showed her true character.

That was one thing Fitz liked about Olivia. But there was something else he had noticed when he went to her office for the first time. He noticed she wasn't like other employees, she wasn't like other friends. No, there was something more to it. Something more to her. And that was what drew him into her. He wanted to know more. He needed to. Which was why he felt so conflicted.

He was married. His wife was pregnant. And he was having feelings for someone else. This was only the beginning of the complications. He didn't even want to think about how this wasn't how a President acted, or really not how he wanted to act as President.

Fitz was stuck in his thoughts. He was meant to be reading FBI reports on his case, and yet his mind was elsewhere. He was trying desperately to remember who Olivia was before he was shot, and even though quite a large portion of his brain, larger than a married President should want, was being used for this task, he was still coming up with naught. The only things that were coming to the surface were memories that he knew were from after he was shot.

He was so lost in thought that he didn't hear anybody sneak up on him. Their hands landed on his shoulders and started massaging them. He shivered in response. "Sorry, I was just trying to help," Mellie said as she pulled her hands back to her side.

Fitz turned to look at his wife. He could see how apologetic she was, but he didn't care. He was sure that Olivia was the only thing he had amnesia about. He knew what his relationship with Mellie was, and it was not this. "What are you doing here?" Fitz asked.

"An aide just told me about the trip you had planned," Mellie said. It was then Fitz remembered that he had forgotten to inform his wife of his travel plans.

"Yes, Olivia thinks that the people should see me in person and not behind a camera, and I happen to agree with her," Fitz replied.

"You can't go," Mellie said sternly.

"And why is that?" Fitz laughed. He was looking forward to hearing this answer.

"I'm about to give birth. What if I go into labour and you're off in New Mexico? I need you here," Mellie answered.

"You're still months away from that. And even if somehow the boy does happen to come to his senses and want to get away from you, I have access to a private jet. You might have heard of it- it's called 'Air Force One', it goes really fast. So even if we're in Alaska, we would still be back before you were screaming out in pain," Fitz said, not really minding how mean that came off.

Mellie decided to push passed his comment, he had said far nastier things in the past. She came in here for information, and she wasn't leaving without it. "Who's 'we'?" She asked.

"Olivia. Olivia's Communications Director, she coming to, you know, direct communications," he answered rather sarcastically.

"Olivia?" Mellie said a little shocked. She was completely against hiring Olivia back and this was exactly the reason why.

"Yes?" Came a voice from behind them, and they both turned to see the aforementioned women standing near the door. She looked nervous to be in there, this was the first time she had seen the two together since the hospital. Not to mention Olivia had barely seen Mellie around since she started back at the White House. Mellie turned to look at Olivia. Fitz couldn't see the exact facial expression across his wife's face, but it was one of distain and anger, and it was directed at only Olivia, and Olivia knew why. "I can come back," Liv said not particularly wanting to get into the middle of the pair.

"No don't, Mellie was just leaving," Fitz said, which made the First Lady turn back to her husband with the same look she was just shooting at Olivia.

"Weren't you?"

"No-" She began.

"Yes, you were. Olivia and I have a lot to discuss, and you are not needed for that," Fitz said and waited for Mellie to move.

Mellie wasn't sure what was going on with Olivia and Fitz. She had always been able to work out when something was going on between them, but this time was different. It was like old times and yet wasn't. She couldn't imagine why they would start being discreet if they were sneaking around again, they both knew she was no stranger to their relationship. Deciding it was better to give up than fight, Mellie left the oval with her tail between her legs.

"What was that about?" Liv asked.

"I didn't tell her about our trip. She came in wanting answers. So I apologise, you shouldn't have seen that," Fitz said.

"You don't need to apologise. From the moment I met you, I knew you and Mellie had problems. So, I am one of the few people who has seen you two at you're worse," she said coming over to sit on the opposite sofa to where Fitz was sitting.

"See, this is what I think is unfair, you know everything about me and my past, and I feel I haven't even scratched the surface of you," Fitz said, causing Liv to hide her pain behind a smile.

"That's probably right," she replied. Liv wanted to get off the subject as quick as possible. It was like a tight wire act. She had to tread very carefully and slowly. "We should probably talk about the trip," Liv said, and Fitz nodded. "So, we've got twenty-five stops so far, now this could go up or down before we leave, but for now it's twenty-five. That's approximately two a day. There will be some nights we'll have to sleep on the jet, but mostly we'll be in a hotel. We'll be starting in New York on Monday, and we'll be in Philadelphia that night. Then we'll go south, going to Georgia and Florida, before travelling to Texas and through the mid-west, and we'll finish up in California. I have scheduled a few rest days if need be, but if those days come and you feel up to it, I've got some backup stops in the flyovers that we've missed. Do you have any questions?" She asked.

"No," he said. Though that was a lie. He had many questions, but most of them were about Olivia. But he knew better to bring them up. He just loved her work ethic and passion. He both hated and loved that she was a mystery. The fact that he didn't know who she was meant that he needed to know what made her special. Now most people who were forgettable- were just that. But Olivia didn't fit into that mould. She had something that pulled you in, she was the type of person that girls wanted to be and guys wanted to have. And he could definitely a test to the latter of that sentence.

But he could never ever let that get out. Because he knew if he ever worked out what he was really feeling for Olivia, it wouldn't amount to anything. She had made that perfectly clear. Not so much with words, but with how she freaked out over the supposed hand incident. Of course it was completely innocent on his behalf, he had no idea what he was doing, he truly did think he was touching the chair. And even thinking back to it now he could not remember touching Olivia the way she said. Though he did believe her. There was no reason she would lie.

"Okay, but if you do, you know where to find me," Liv said as she stood up and left.

Fitz just sat there. He knew he had to forget about whatever he was feeling towards Olivia, but as irony would have it, Olivia seemed to be unforgettable.

 **Ohhhh If only Fitz knew.**

 **How long do you think until he remembers? Do you think what he's feeling is what remains of the past, or are they new feelings?**

 **Please Review :D**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi all, so that's right its a new chapter, just like you asked for, and wow was I blown away by how much you wanted it back, and i know it took a while for me to write it but school, life, and others etc.**

 **I really hope you like this one.**

Olivia, along with her Prada handbag, strolled from the black SUV to Air Force One, that was currently located at Andrews. As she ascended the staircase on to the plane she turned back to see her suitcases being loaded on by the ground crew. She had enough clothes packed in her bag for about a week, before she had to start repeating outfits.

Two weeks alone on the road with Fitz. There was once upon a time where that meant secretly sharing hotel rooms, holding hands in the back of the bus, or kissing in an empty elevator, but now it just meant added adherence to a strict professional working relationship.

Liv had spent the half a week working round the clock getting everything prepared for the road trip across America. Though could it be classified as a road trip if they were mostly travelling by air? If Olivia was a weaker person she would have never suggested this trip. But she hadn't been able to become Olivia Pope without taking some good and proper hits along the way. It made her the woman she was today. The strong confident woman that could put aside the past and focus on the task at hand.

Or so she liked to tell herself.

In all honesty Olivia had no idea how she was going to handle the next two weeks. At least in D.C. she had people to vent too. On the road, her only option would be Fitz, and that was no longer an option.

She was one of the first people to arrive. She'd driven over with her small communications team. The President was yet to arrive. They had decided to do a theatrical departure with Fitz leaving from the South Lawn on Marine One, with Mellie waving him off. Liv had not wanted to watch that.

She had seen that show enough times. It always seemed fake. Which was something to appreciate. Even without her in the equation, Mellie and Fitz's relationship was nothing to feel threatened about. That gave her something to smile about, even if nothing else did.

Olivia set up in one of the offices at the back of the plane. There was a large table in the centre of the room, just perfect for working on. She assumed Fitz would head straight to the President's room when he arrived and boarded.

She couldn't be completely certain, but in the last few days it seemed as if Fitz was keeping his distance. But then so had she, so it probably wasn't anything to worry about. Or even think too much about. And yet it was all she could think about.

There were a few taps on the door, but before Liv could shout to whoever was on the other side, the offender of the knocking came in. "Mr President," Liv said, seeing Fitz standing in the doorway. Somehow, he looked handsomer than he was the last time she had seen him. And that was only an hour or two ago in the White House halls, though from a distance.

"Can I come in?" He asked, as teetered from foot to foot in place.

"Of course," she said, wondering why he was being so awkward. Fitz took a few steps into the room, over to where Olivia was set up. "Is there anything I can do for you, sir?" Liv asked, but internally recoiled. Was there anything worse than calling someone you used to have sex with 'sir'? It made her feel like just another secretary sleeping with her boss, and it had never ever felt like that with Fitz, not once.

"Just wanted to check in. I didn't see you before I left," he said.

"I wanted to get a jump start, get everything set up that I needed. After all, this will be my office for the next two weeks," Liv replied, there was no way she was going to tell him about how she despised seeing him a Mellie play pretend sucky-face.

Overhead, the speakers the captain told everybody to take their seats for take-off, and Oliva assumed that Fitz would go back to his cabin, but he walked over to a belted seat and clasped himself in. Olivia had no other option but to take the only seat next to him.

She kept her attention on the buckle, not really sure what to with her hands, or even her mouth. She had no idea what to say. It'd been a while since she let herself be alone in a room with Fitz. But she always had an out, when she did. Now she couldn't just 'excuse herself' until the captain said it was safe to roam about the cabin again. Sure, it was Air Force One, the safest plane in the world, but there were still rules you had to adhere to.

"So, Olivia," Fitz began and then took a deep breath as if psyching himself up for what he was about to say. Liv looked up at him, sure the next words out of his mouth were going to be about the trip. "Would you think I was crazy, if I said- I feel like we've done this before?" Fitz asked, grinning slightly.

"Been on a plane together?" She asked, not all that certain what he was referring to.

"No, no, we would have obviously done that before. I mean, this trip. Well, not exactly _this_ trip. Unless I also don't remember being shot before now, which is a possibility I can't rule out. But no, I meant a trip like this. Just you and me, on the road, going to the people," he waffled on, not sure if he was making any sense.

"Do you remember?" Liv asked, her words getting caught in her throat. Slightly scared to hear his answer.

"I don't know. I don't think so. I know what you all are telling me. That we worked together on the campaign trail. That we have done this before," he explained, though he was sure he was just rambling on, and Olivia was just politely nodding along because he was the Commander-in-Chief.

"Oh," she let out, why she was going along with this conversation was beyond her, it was only going to break her heart again, like it had been a hundred times already.

"But it's different this time, I _feel_ like we've done this before. I don't remember it, but usually when someone tells me something about you that I should know, be it Cyrus, Mellie or even you, I'm skeptical, thinking if it was the truth, I'd remember it, but this time, this time-"

"You feel it," Liv said, trying to keep her voice neutral, and not give away that he had just sent her heart, brain and stomach spinning.

"It's probably nothing, it's nothing," Fitz said.

"It's not nothing. You feel it. That is definitely something," Liv said decided not to hide her smile from him, and as soon as she did, Fitz smile grew about the two sizes bigger. "Thank you for letting me know, you should let me know if you _feel_ anything else again," Liv said, still overjoyed at what this possibly could mean. Was it coming back to him? Would he soon remember? Would they be able to go back to the old Liv and Fitz? Liv couldn't believe this was happening.

"I sure will," Fitz said, it seemed he was just as eager to remember as Liv was for him to. And it was only fair Olivia be the first to know of any new developments. Fitz just hoped they would come.

 **So thoughts?**

 **Is this the first real sign that Fitz is starting to remember?**

 **Also what do you thinks gonna happen on this trip? Will it be a second beginning for these two?**

 **Please review, I love reading your feedback :D**


	13. Chapter 13

**OMG Look guys it didnt take me a year to upload a new chapter, its a miracle ahah.**

 **Thanks for still reading! Enjoy :)**

They'd had a stop in New York, and it had gone exactly to plan. Fitz's communications staff had written him a great speech and Fitz had hit it out of the park. It was going to equal good press, and that was exactly what they needed at the moment.

Fitz was worried. If he didn't remember who Olivia was, then what else had he forgotten? Was he even able to function as President? He'd yet to see any side effects that resulted in poor job performance, but that didn't mean there wouldn't be something in future days. Though, he thought, if the papers were saying good things about him then maybe there was no need to worry.

They were right on schedule to Philadelphia, or really a half hour behind, but that was as close to on time as you got, when you were the President. Fitz had asked Olivia to leave some leeway room cause he wanted to get as much hand holding and kissing babies done as possible. It sent a good message. If he was able to greet the people, then he was in tip top shape.

Olivia watched from back stage as Fitz give the repeated speech in the City of Brotherly Love. She missed watching this man speak. He had such a command of the crowd, you felt in awe when he was speaking, or that each word was specifically crafted just for your ears.

It reminded her of the campaign trail, watching from the sidelines. Except this wasn't the campaign trail. There wasn't going to be any 'one minutes' in hallways, or any 'inappropriate' moments. And there certainly wasn't going to be any secret hotel rendezvous' after a victory.

Somehow, at the end of the day all the staff ended up in Fitz's hotel suite for a night cap after all the press engagement were done for the night. In all honesty, it was a way for Fitz to spend more time with Olivia without making it too obvious that that was what he wanted. Was it so wrong?

Well yes. He was conflicted. He shouldn't be wanting to get to know his Communications Director as anything more than a colleague, or really a sub-ordinate. But that was all he was thinking about. He wanted to know everything about her. Everything he had forgotten. And things he even never knew. He just wanted to know this beautiful amazing woman. And it was killing him that he once did.

His eyes were trained on her as she got out of her chair and used the bathroom in his suite. He hoped no one else could notice.

"Owh, I'm beat," Fitz said, feigning a yawn. "I don't remember the trail being this tiring," he said, and the group let out a chuckle. But they all collectively got the message and started on their way out the room. As his staff were calling out their goodbyes and instructions for tomorrow, he hoped like all hell that they wouldn't be loud enough for Olivia to hear them leaving, or that they wouldn't remember that Olivia was in the bathroom.

The last person left the suite just as the bathroom door opened. Olivia stood there stunned. Fitz's room was full orf lively debate and laughter when she went in, it was quite the contrast on her re-entry.

"How long was I in there?" Olivia joked not sure what was happening. And also, in reality, she had only been in there for two and a half minutes at most.

"They all called it a night," Fitz said, as if this hadn't gone exactly how he planned.

"Maybe I should too," Liv said, but she made no attempt for the door. She couldn't be 100% certain, her reading of Fitz hadn't been all that correct in the last few weeks, but she was sure he had somehow orchestrated it. And that made her feel warm inside. Something that had been severely lacking in her life in recent history.

"Where would we be in life, if we always did what we 'should'?" Fitz asked rhetorically. He had that cocky way to him, that Liv loved. This was looking like old Fitz. But it couldn't be, could it?

"You want me to stay?" Liv asked, hoping for an answer in the affirmative.

"What I want, is to play a game," he replied.

"A game?" she questioned as if it was the most ridiculous thing she had heard, which was ironic given their situation. "I'm sorry, sir, but Presidents don't typically play games."

"Presidents don't typically get shot in the head and forget one particular person either," he said, a grin forming onto the left side of his face.

"Touché," Liv said. "What sort of game do you have in mind?" She asked taking a seat on a sofa. It wasn't the same place she was sitting in before, but she wanted to see if Fitz would come sit next to her, and that wasn't all that possible in a singular chair from the table set.

Her queries were quickly answered when he took the cushion next to her. It wasn't like right next to her, there was still a considerable distance between the pair, far more than there once would have been. But then also if these two were alone in a hotel room, or really any type of room, they weren't going to be playing games.

"It called 'Have we ever'," Fitz replied.

"Is that a drinking game?" Liv asked. She hadn't ever heard of the game before, but she could guess that Fitz had made it up.

"It could be, but I actually want to remember your answers," Fitz replied, putting his glass down on the side table.

"What are the rules?" Liv asked.

"I ask question, like- 'Have we ever…smoked a joint behind a Gettysburger together?' and you have to answer it honestly," he explained.

"I can honestly say we haven't," Liv answered. The game worried her, it could lead to some uncharted territory. However, if all the questions were going to be like that, she had nothing to fret over.

"Well that one I knew," he said, and Olivia shot him a surprised look that questioned 'how' he knew that. "You know, from logistics and press perception, it's a no brainer," he answered her unspoken question. "Alright first question- Have we ever danced together?"

"Inauguration balls and State Dinners," Liv shyly smiled, as she replayed one of their many dances in her head. A luxury Fitz did not have.

"Have we ever gone to Camp David together?" He asked. Liv was happy, so far, the questions were easy enough to answer.

"Yes, we have, multiple times."

"Have we ever had dinner together? I mean just you and me. Not formal occasions where we were at opposites sides of the table."

"I think there were a couple times on the trail, you know, when Mellie and Cyrus were off campaigning somewhere else. But not really since you've taken office," she answered. Liv wasn't sure if answering these questions was helping him, but if innocent questions could aid in getting his memory back, she was all for it.

"Have we ever pulled an all-nighter?" He asked and by the look on Olivia's face, he could tell it was a stupid question. They worked in Politics, there were days when you didn't even see the sun, but nights when you didn't see your bed were much more common. "Okay, have we ever hooked up in the Lincoln bedroom?" Fitz asked, and then burst out laughing, because he thought his joke was hilarious.

And yet Olivia wasn't laughing. She could answer honestly and say 'no' but did she really want to? He was laughing as if it was the most preposterous thing in the world, and yet it very much could have happened, if they'd stumbled into a different room during one of their 'strategy sessions'.

"No," she said when Fitz had stopped. "We have not."

"Have we ever-" he began but got cut off.

"I don't want to play anymore," Liv said, standing up and stepping away from Fitz.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to have to tell you these things. I want you to remember. It's why I stayed away after you woke up. It's why I didn't want to take the job. Or why I haven't already told you everything. You think this is hard for you. Well what about me? Have you ever considered how hard it is for me? You're one of my closest friends, and you don't know who I am? The wife you loathe? She's seemingly unforgettable. That workers bill you got passed in your first 100 day? Still in there. But me? Olivia Pope. Gone. And there's a part of me that's wishing this is a sick prank to get back at me, but the longer this goes on, I know it's real. And it's killing me. So, no, I don't want to play anymore," Olivia said, and turned to leave.

"Wait, Olivia," Fitz called, but she continued to the door. "Livvie, stop," and she did.

 **LIVVIE? What does this mean?**

 **Tell me what you think...**

 **Please Review :D**


	14. Chapter 14

**OMG guys i'm so overwhelmed with the response i have gotten from this story, it means a whole lot to me. And I'm so blessed to have such lovely readers. Thank you. I hope you enjoy.**

"What did you call me?" Olivia asked as she slowly turned back. When she looked at his face, she had no idea how to read it. He looked broken and yet confused. Like she had just pulled his heart out and didn't know why. But she was sure she had heard 'Livvie' come out of his mouth. She couldn't have just heard what she wanted to. Could've she?

"Livvie?" He replied, not sure of himself. He truly had no idea where that came from. But he didn't want to have to tell Olivia that. It got her to stay. It obviously meant something. Unless she thought it was inappropriate. Maybe that was it.

With one word he had taken all the power away from her and completely turned the situation on its head. She wanted to run to him and envelop him in the tightest hug, while not taking her lips of his. "You called me Livvie. You…The old you. He called me Livvie. Sometimes. Not all the time. But sometimes…" she nearly whispered. Liv hated that she referred to her Fitz as the 'old Fitz'. But that's how it was now.

"I did?" He asked.

"You don't remember," she said mostly to remind herself. This wasn't his memory coming back. This was just a small blip. A brain slip. Maybe it was a sign that he was going to remember, and although she wanted to be hopeful, there came a time when the hope hurt more than the acceptance. "Of course, you don't remember."

"But I want to. Doesn't that make up for something. I hate that there's a part of me that gone. Apparently lost forever, it seems. There is nothing I want more than to know who you are. To remember. A part of me is missing. And from what I can tell it's a very important part," Fitz said. Olivia stayed next to the door. She needed to keep some distance. Every word he said, felt like a stab to the gut.

She found it hard to swallow, and salt water stung her eyes, as she blinked back the tears. She couldn't let him know how much she was hurting. Because he couldn't help her like she wanted to be helped. He couldn't hold her tighter and warmer than anyone ever had. He couldn't kiss her forehead and assure her everything was going to be alright. He couldn't even remember the occasions when he had done that.

"Please, just tell me," Fitz begged.

But even with the defeatist look he was sporting, Olivia wanted to stick to her guns. She wanted him to remember on his own. So, she turned back to the door, and twisted the handle. "Good night, Mr President."

The door slammed shut behind her. Fitz wanted to chase her down, and not let her go. They couldn't leave it there. They couldn't leave it like this. He'd give anything for her to be back in the room with him.

Fitz plopped down into the sofa, his head in his hands. "Livvie," he repeated almost silently. The gravitas of it filled the air around him. He knew it meant something, he just didn't know what.

…

 _Fitz stood at the front of his campaign staff, he was asking for their ideas, questioning them on why they weren't winning. A Fitzgerald Grant banner hung from the ceiling, his face was on the posters covering the walls. Everyone looked as lost as he felt. He shouldn't have been losing the election, but he was._

 _A blinding white light came from the back of the room, but he couldn't turn away. It was captivating, it drew him in, like a moth to a lantern. It gave him the energy the campaign had taken away. It was everything he needed._

 _He wanted to reach out and touch it, but couldn't, he was rendered motionless. No one could look away. It passed through the crowd, holding everyone's attention as it did. And then it stopped. Mere feet from Fitz._

 _And then suddenly in a flash it was gone, and what was left was Olivia._

…

Fitz woke calmly, almost like a sweet bliss had poured over him while he was sleeping. He'd never dreamed of Olivia before, or at least not from what he remembered. But this didn't feel like just a dream. It felt real. As if it had happened. Which of course made no sense. Balls of light didn't just float through rooms.

But it had to be real, otherwise what the hell did it mean.

He had no motivation to get out of bed. He wanted to lie there and just think about what he had seen. It had to be a memory. He replayed it in his mind again and again. Except when he did, there was no ball of light, there was just Olivia.

She had told him they met on the campaign trail. Could this be that? Their first meeting? Was he enthralled with her even back then?

There was a knock on the door, and a very large part of him wanted it to be Olivia. Could she have come to talk about last night? Apologise for leaving how she did? Or maybe she wanted to have breakfast together before the day really started.

He hopped out of bed in a rush and made his way over to the suite's door. But when he pulled it open, he was disappointed to see she wasn't on the other side. He put on an unaffected face when he saw the agent in front of him.

"I was told to wake you," the agent said. Fitz nodded and went back into his room.

Fitz left the suite after getting ready and was walking down the hotel hallway when he saw Olivia. He saw her quickly dart away when she saw him. It would have made him laugh if it wasn't so tradgic.

"Olivia," Fitz called after her.

Liv had no other option but to stop and wait for him to catch up to her. It was quite difficult to dodge the leader of the free world. "Good morning, Mr President," she said as they began to walk side by side.

"About last night-" Fitz began.

"We don't need to talk about it," Liv said cutting him off.

"I want to," Fitz replied. He wanted to tell her about the dream or really the memory that came back last night. It wasn't much, but it was something. And that was sure to bring her some happiness. And he couldn't wait to see her reaction.

Olivia stilled and put her hand on Fitz's arm to stop him. "I think we should forget about it. We have two weeks together and we need to focus on the work. So, let's keep things professional," she said.

"But Olivia-" Fitz started. This was the opposite of what he wanted. And he really thought Olivia had the right to know he remembered something, no matter how little or insignificant it may seem.

"Please," she implored him. If she learnt anything from last night, it was that they needed boundaries. All she wanted was to protect herself. She thought this trip was going to be easy, that she could handle it. But last night proved that wasn't the case. If she was going to be the strong confident woman she knew herself to be, she needed to stay away from Fitz.

"Okay," he relented. Fitz was actually able to read her and decided to not push her on it. If she needed her space, then he was going to give her that.

All he wished was that she knew that he was starting to remember.

 **He remembers something!**

 **Will he remember more, or will he need Olivia's help?**

 **Please Review :D**


	15. Chapter 15

**Gee you take two weeks off from a story and people think you're gonna be gone for a year (Like who would do that? Lol jks its me). Anyway, heres a new chapter as requested. You might be wondering why I've been updating New Normal and not Afire Love recently. Well the answer is simple. I write the one i have an idea for. Also New Normal is so close (Like real close) to being finished, i want to get it done, and then i can solely focus on this one (and my school work i guess)**

 **Anyway, enjoy :)**

Every night it was the same damn dream. She didn't appear as a ball of light anymore, no she was always Olivia. Fitz could see her mouth moving but couldn't hear what she was saying. He still had the overwhelming same feeling he did the first time his remembered this, but he'd yet to really remember anything else. It did end differently though. When Olivia reached him, he would always say a quick 'hi' and then so would she. And then nothing. There had to be more. Why had he remembered that much and nothing else?

It was no wonder she said she wanted nothing to do with him. He really hadn't thought about how this could have affected her. He wondered what it would be if the tables had turned. If she was the one that had been shot, and subsequently forgotten just him. He didn't like that. He didn't even know why he didn't like that. But he knew he wouldn't have been able to handle it. Could it have been for the best that the bullet hit him, and not anyone else?

Was Olivia there when he was shot? Could it have hit her instead? Was that why he couldn't remember her? Was he holding on to unrealised contempt? Because if so, he would let that go in an instant if that got his memory back.

Each night he laid awake trying to picture her in his life before she had walked into his hospital room. But every night was the same. And then he would hope that when he did eventually fall asleep she would fill his dreams, but aside from that one repeating memory, she never did.

During the day she would ignore him as best she could. Of course, nothing was overt to anyone else but him. It pained Fitz to know she deliberately avoiding him. This had been going on for almost half their trip. If she kept it up, Fitz wasn't sure she would return to the White House, after all was said and done. He had to remember her before it was too late.

But it seemed the more she stayed away from him, the harder it was for the memories to come back. He needed her help, otherwise what she was asking of him was impossible.

The team was working late in the hotel's conference room, and slowly members of the staff were turning in for the night. Olivia didn't even realise they were the last two left. But Fitz did.

"Olivia, can we please talk," he near begged.

It was at this moment that Olivia looked up and noticed they were totally alone, aside from some secret service agents that were undoubtedly in earshot. "I have to go to my room," Liv said as she picked up the files she was working on and began to stalk off.

"Ms Pope, I am your Commander in Chief and you will stay and talk to me," he near growled. But it was enough to stop Olivia in her tracks. She knew she had to stay, even though she really didn't want to, but she decided she wasn't going to make this easy for him.

"You don't get to do that. You can't use being the President to get what you want from me. You don't use your role as my boss, to dictate when we talk. Especially when it is about personal issues. I have told you what you need to do to continue any discussion on that subject, and until then I urge you to keep things professional," Liv spat back.

"I remember," he said. It was wrong to word it like that, she could get her hopes up and think he remembered _everything_. Or she could come to think of him as a liar, which he certainly didn't want.

Olivia froze, not sure she had heard him right, and yet she knew she had. He remembered? Could he really be telling her he knew who she was. But that couldn't be. If he did, he wouldn't be acting the way he had. He would have thrown her over his shoulder and taken her to bed by now if that was the case. He didn't remember. He couldn't. "Don't tell me what you think I want to hear. It's wrong and beneath you," she said harshly.

"I do though. Not everything. But something. Isn't that enough?" Fitz said, to him even the littlest thing was an accomplishment, but he had no idea if Olivia would feel the same way. But shouldn't she be happy. He was doing what she wanted. Going about it a little slowly, maybe, but that just meant there was more to come in time.

"What then?" She asked curiously. Maybe she could catch him in a lie. But she knew Fitz wasn't the type to do that. But then again, maybe he was. What if before he had been playing her, and now was the real Fitz. Her mind was a mess. She just wanted to go back to how things used to be, was that too much to ask.

"I think, it's from when we first met," he said, happy that this was finally coming out. It had been a long week not being able to share this with her. And if Olivia recognised the memory she could tell him where it really came from in their history together.

"When you tried to fire me?" She asked realising she'd said too much. She wasn't meant to be putting memories in his brain.

"I tried to fire you?" Fitz asked. What on earth would have possessed him to fire such a beautiful and smart woman the moment they met. And that was when he realised that was probably the problem. He had been attracted to her, just like he was now. God was he stupid.

"I shouldn't have said that," Olivia said as she began to internally kick herself.

"I'm glad you did," Fitz replied, it was as if she had just opened up a part of his brain. Of course, the memories didn't start flooding back, but to understand his psyche back then was going to help a lot.

"So, what do you remember?" Liv asked.

Fitz came around the table to where Olivia was standing. He pulled out a chair and faced her as he sat. He was hoping she would follow his cue and also take a seat, however she remained standing. "I was yelling at my campaign staff, and then out of nowhere you appear and put me in my place," Fitz explained, and he watched Olivia carefully waiting to see a reaction, but there was none. "I can't tell you what you said, that part isn't clear to me," he added, though he was sure that saying that would hinder more than help.

"Okay," Liv said as she took a seat. She didn't know what to think. It was only a partial memory. Only a brief part of their lives together, but it was something. But did it change anything? If he remembered their one minutes in the hall, or that first night in the hotel, or giving her doux bebe, it would be would mean he knew what they were. What they were meant to be. And why this was so hard for her. "Is that all?"

"Yeah," Fitz said, his face almost grief stricken. "Can you please tell me where it's from?" He pleaded. Maybe if he knew more about what he was seeing, what she was saying would come back, or new memories would form, or that he could understand the true meaning behind it.

Olivia weighed up her options, she could tell him, and go against what she had been telling herself for the last week, or not and leave him to figure it out on his own. But leaving Fitz's mind to work without help was taking so long, far longer than she would have felt was possible. But she could see how much pain he was in, and large part of her wanted to help him. And maybe by doing so she would help herself. "You're right, it's from when we met," she said. What else was there to say. He didn't really remember all that much. "Cyrus had bought me in to help with the campaign. I told you what you needed to hear, you didn't like it because you knew it was the truth. And the truth hurts," Olivia said.

"I asked Cyrus to fire you," he said. And Olivia realised that he wasn't asking her, he was telling her, and that he had just got a little bit more of his memory back.

"You didn't know that before."

"It just came to me," he said, quite shocked to say the least. "I've had this memory swirling around in my mind for nearly a week, and nothing. It's like a puzzle, you get one piece to fit correctly, and maybe the others start falling into place," he continued, hoping it was making some sense. If he could show Olivia he just needed a little bit of help, then maybe she would be more receptive. He'd do anything for her to talk to him again, really talk to him again. He didn't think he was asking too much.

"And that hasn't happened before?" Olivia asked. She didn't know if it was her, or time that was helping. The doctors had said in their hypothetical scenario that his memory could come back in time. Was that what was happening. Or did she need to help him remember? It actually gave her hope. She now knew that the memories were in there. They weren't gone forever, they were just hiding.

"No. It's usually when I'm asleep. It's a dream that feels too real to be fake. It's been playing over and over. Every night. The same thing. I think it's you, Olivia. I need you to help me. Because no matter how hard I try, I can't do this on my own," he said. "And I'm not asking as your boss, or your President. I'm asking as your friend. So, Olivia Pope, will you help me?"

 **So what will Liv choose? Will she help him, or not?**

 **Please Review :D**


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey Guys, so I'm happy to say I finally finished The New Normal. Yay right. Right. (So if you've been meaning to check it out, now seems like as good a time as any ahah)**

 **Anyway that means the Scandal Fanfiction side of my brain can focus solely on this one. So that can hopefully only mean good things for this story. So I hope you like this new chapter :)**

Olivia looked down, there was no way she could think of a response while looking into Fitz's pleading eyes. He really wanted to remember more about them, and he needed her to do it. But could she tell him everything? Of course not. That would be ludicrous. But would it be? It had been quite some time since he woke up in the hospital, and he might now be ready to know the facts.

She couldn't have been completely certain, but she felt that he wouldn't run away screaming if he really knew the truth of what had been going on between them. He wouldn't call her a liar, or throw it in her face, and maybe, it would actually help him.

But then again, what if she created false memories for him. What if he would no longer be able to tell the difference between his reality and hers. And although they would have been near similar, no one's experiences are the exact same. What if by telling him the truth she was doing more harm than good.

It would be like threading a needle or walking a tightrope. She needed precision and perfect execution, and although she knew she had it in her, she didn't know if she herself was ready for it.

"Okay," Liv replied looking back up to meet his face. But before he could break out in the happiness he was feeling, she continued. "But we are going to do it my way."

Fitz nodded, that seemed fair. He was fine with going at her pace. Her pace would have to be faster than his. Anything had to be quicker than a one-minute memory in a week.

"Take my hand," Liv said, and Fitz took it as an order and his hand was soon in hers. He liked the texture of Olivia's skin, it was soft, and he liked the feeling when he grabbed onto her fingers. He didn't know what her method was, but at the moment, he was quite liking it. Liv rolled her fingers to her palm, bringing Fitz's with her. She placed her thumb on his pinkie knuckle, so he wouldn't let go, but she knew Fitz wouldn't, so it was really there so she could touch him more.

"Now what?" Fitz asked, not that he was complaining.

"Close your eyes," she instructed, and he did. "Take a deep breath," Liv said, and she and Fitz inhaled and exhaled at the same time. "Now, imagine you're not the President, you're not the Governor, you're just Fitz. And I'm not your Communications Director or working on your campaign, I'm just Liv. There's nothing around. No pressure, no expectations, just us, okay?" Fitz didn't reply, he just nodded. "Don't say anything. Open your eyes."

He slowly opened the, and he and Olivia seemed a lot closer together than before. He could have kissed her, and by God, did he want to. But he didn't, he just kept looking at her. He felt light, as if he could float away. He never felt like that. The pressures were always weighing him down. But looking into Olivia's eyes, his mind was a blank.

Unconsciously his free hand came up and rested on Olivia's cheek. She leaned into it but didn't break eye contact. Their breaths were in sync and Fitz had never felt so close to someone. It really was just them. With barely saying a word, she was able to peel all the layers away from him, and though he still couldn't remember, there was something in him tingling to get out.

All Liv could think about how much she loved this man and how much she missed him. It was unfair, he was right there, she could literally reach out and have him, but she knew he wouldn't be hers yet. Liv's thumb slowly rubbed the back of his hand. She knew what she was conveying was far more than she or he expected, but he would infer what he wanted to, and she just hope a feeling had more power than words.

"I'm trying Livvie," Fitz said, and it was as if the old him was talking to her, like he was clawing to get back to his Olivia.

A tear dropped down Liv's cheek, she didn't even get a chance to blink it back, it just fell. Fitz wiped it away, he didn't like seeing her so sad. He hated that he was the one who was making her feel like this, he should have been taking away her pain not creating it.

"I'm sorry," Fitz said wishing that was enough for her, but knew it never would be. "What kind of man am I to forget you?" He asked nearly verbatim for something he had once said to her, and that was enough to make her flood gates open up. She crumpled her face in to his palm, too embarrassed to show him how she was feeling, and how his words affected her.

Suddenly, the door to the conference room opened and in came a secret service agent. Fitz's hand quickly flew away from Olivia's face as if he had been caught in the most compromising act. Their hands stayed connected though. The agent nodded to the President, and then walked out again.

"He didn't even flinch?" Fitz said, and Liv knew that the agent's interruption was enough to break Fitz out of his spell. Liv let go of Fitz's hand, so she could wipe her face. She had to find her composure, fast.

"He's trained not to," Liv replied, not bothering to tell Fitz that this was not the first time they'd been caught doing something like that, or worse, by one of his agents. Fitz turned back to Liv, he sat there silent for a beat, trying to play back everything that had just happened between them.

"You call me Fitz?" He asked, choosing to start there.

"I did," Olivia said, and even just answering that let Fitz know that their relationship was far beyond boss and employee.

"Why not anymore?" he asked. She had been an example of professionalism, calling him Mr. President or sir, but never anything beyond that.

Olivia wanted to say it would have been 'inappropriate' and see if that stirred up anything but decided against it. "I didn't think you would have appreciated a stranger calling you that," she said instead.

"But you're not a stranger," Fitz replied.

"I was to you," she said. Even now she felt like a stranger to him. Until he knew the whole truth on how things really were between them, she would continue to feel like that. "Did it help?" Olivia asked, hoping that something would have come back to him.

"I think so," he answered. He had a lot of feelings come at him, and he had to break them down to really understand them. So much had happened and they had barely said a word to one another. "I don't know," he said. It felt like he had been so close to unlocking everything and then bam it was gone. And he had no idea how to get it back. But his mind was a mess, every little thought span round his head at warp speed, and it wasn't helping.

"Sleep on it," Liv said standing up. She couldn't be alone with him anymore, or at least not right now, it was too much for her. "I'll see you in the morning," she said as she started to walk away.

"Hey, Liv," he called, and she anxiously turned back. "You can call me Fitz from now on," he said, causing Olivia to smile.

"Good night, Fitz," she said before departing the room.

Fitz looked around at empty conference table. His thoughts consumed him. He'd been closer to Olivia than he could remember, and the closer he got to her the more he realised how much closer he wanted to get. She was everything he could possibly ever want, and yet he couldn't have her. He knew if he pushed her too hard she could leave him forever and he did not think he'd be able to handle that. Because now that he had her, the only way he would let her leave was by a bullet in his brain.

 **Ohhh, do you think it'll help him?**

 **Did you like Liv's method? Or would you have done something different?**

 **Please Review :D**


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